Random Lulz Thread

Got anything humorous or something you just want to show? Do it here.

I just created a character at a Dragonball Z RP Forum and promised the guys to show it all. It's kind of big though. Hope you guys will read it!

Name:
Shuryou Antranius.
Age:
74 years old.
Race:
Half Namekian, Half Saiyan.
Height:
10 feet tall.
Weight:
Approximately 200 pounds.
Character Description:
Shuryou has pale green skin, looking like a fusion between a human skin color and the usual Namekian skin color, and has a ponytail hanging from the back of his head as the rest has been shaved off. The color of his hair is black and comes down the middle of his back. It's been held together by a white-colored band at the base of the ponytail. He has a tainted scar over his right eye, making it look black on his already unusual skin color, while his left eye has a dark gray pupil in it. He has a small patch of black hair hanging from his chin in the shape of a triangle. On the top of his head, more at the front, are two small antennaes that are signature features of the Namekians although Shuryou's are smaller. His ears also are pointer than humanoid ears, edging towards Namekian ears but not entirely.
Shuryou wears a black leather trenchcoat over his body that reaches to his knees and has long sleeves that also cover a part of his hands. He wears no shirt under it, showing off his skin whenever he feels like. Surgically attached to his hands are mechanic devices that allow him to create claws made of energy by focusing his own energy on them. Each claw constists of three energy 'nails'. On his back is a round flat machine surgically attached in his skin, although it's still visible, that allows him to instantly move from spot to spot. In short, it's a teleporting device which creates a black hole for even less than a second around Shuryou that sucks him in and places him somewhere else as he can control it with his own lifeforce.
He wears baggy black pants to cover his nether regions with multiple pockets around. In one of his pockets is a device can check the power level of others. His boots are mostly covered by his pants, which is useful to hide the fact they're metallic, and each has two small holes on the bottom which can be used to make Shuryou fly through the air when he focuses his energy on them.
Power Level:
Supressed: 1000
Without supressing: 20.000.000
Super Namek form: 40.000.000
Ki Abilities:
- Instant Replacement; Shuryou utilizes the device engraved in his back to teleport. He can use this without using a lot of energy. This can be used in fighting, but also in dodging or everyday life.
- Claw Beams; Shuryou throws more energy into the mechanical claws attached to his hand and shoots a beam, split up in three, at an opponent. He can shoot two at once, if wanted.
- Antra-Beam; Shuryou's signature attack with the weapons engraved in his hands. Holding his wrists against each other, he focuses energy into the machinery within to open a hole within each hand. Energy starts to collect itself in these holes to eventually to shot out at an enemy.
- Dimension Slasher; Shuryou disappears completely out of sight, using his transporting device to the fullest to remain in another dimension, while only his laser claws are visible. He then starts to slash at the enemy, while he can't be hit. This ability may not last long, but his speed increases in the other dimension thus making it capable of hitting the enemy plenty of times before making himself appear again.
- Kaiser Blade; Utilizing the machines in his hands again, he creates an enegy sword on each hand that are longer than his usual claws. When this is activated, he uses this as weapon until he decided to return to claws. These are good for a slightly longer range attacking, but deal less damage all around. Admittedly, three 'nails' is better than one blade.
- Kaiser Flash; By putting the claws close to each, Shuryou can create a horizontal wave of energy he can launch at the enemies. He does this by making a crescent movement to the front with his claws.
- Destructo Disc; Taught by Kame on his visit with Shuryou and seeing as it fit Shuryou's abilites, Shuryou can create a disc of lethal energy above his hand and which can cleave anything that's in the disc's path.
- Flying; Shuryou focuses his energy on his boots to make him float and fly. Beams coming from his boots are non-existant.
- Regeneration; Shuryou's Namekian blood gives him the ability to regenerate lost limbs and wounds if he has a good set amount of time without interruption, because he isn't a full blood Namek.
- Super Namek form; The ancient secrets of the Saiyans and those of fused Nameks are formed into this. Shuryou can unlock his 'true potential' with this ability to increase his power level even more.

History:
Shuryou Antranius was a scientific experiment in a laboratory on planet Earth where criminals had captured scientific minds. They demanded they'd create the ultimate warrior to assist them in the robberies of the century. With them they had two particles of DNA that were meant to be used in the creation of their 'super warrior'. Blood of a Namek and blood of a deceased Saiyan which had been preserved in liquid ice. The DNA was still intact, but they were wondering if this idea would actually work. 'A Namek and a Saiyan, it'd never work', they thought. But the future showed otherwise.

It took a year for the first humanoid signs to appear within the tube they had for 'Project SA' which simply stood for 'super assault'. While the scientists knew this plan was to create a diabolical fiend, they also knew that with this technology and knowledge they could help entire cities. No, worlds from being attacked by unknown enemies constantly. A year later, the being had taken form of an already teenage-looking kid because of the Namekian DNA. He looked like a human being, even though he had signs from both DNA parts. The green skin, the hair on a Namekian, the power level that was growing with each second until it hit a stop.

The criminals were amused at the fact their plan actually worked as they didn't know what the outcome would bring, like the scientists at first. A year passed again while the scientists learned the child the basics of living and approximately everything of the world that was worth learning. But the people who had commanded his birth weren't around all the time, thus this allowed the scientist to teach Shuryou about criminal actions and the consequences of these.

One day however... Shuryou fell down at a time, his heart stopped while his internal organs stopped working as well. Not wanting to lose their precious 'child', the scientists created machines for the child so he could continue living even though it was through the use of machines. A famous martial artist, known as Kame, had been asked to teach the child how to control his Ki so he could also control the uses of his machines. The scientists had to lie the inventions were for 'the use of army' so they could get funding and were practically forced by their lie to create offensive parts for Shuryou. The criminals didn't exactly complain.

Years passed and the child grew up slowly to a well-taught young man, but the criminals were growing impatient. "When will this being do something useful!?" they had asked. "Please, do understand... This is not merely a being. His name is Shuryou," was the reply. But the reply did not appease the nameless villain. Shuryou saw, before his very own eyes, the only person he could ever call 'father' shot. In a burst of anger and fury, Shuryou unleashed his 'true potential' causing the machines to execute their proper uses. Having learned battle techniques from Kame, morals from the scientists and hate from the criminals, he charged for every criminal in the vicinity and murdered them one by one.

After his hands were drenched in blood, similar to the computers around him, he looked at the scientists that had nurtured him through life and taught him what he now knew. Saluting at them, he started to float and shot like a rocket through the roof as he left for uncharted planes.

Years later, he strays the planet Earth and others to battle evil whenever he can. Although much has happened in his past, he doesn't believe it was a sad and dark past. True, there was plenty of blood and guts flying over the place. But he did the right thing and he knew his 'parents' would be proud of him, as he often imagined them as a female Saiyan standing next to a male Namek. A scientific mind in his head, a strong body on the outside, he strives to destroy evil while trying to maintain a good name as his actions are sometimes overreacted but he has never known 'emotions' of the sort.

Battle Sample:
"Father...?" Shuryou muttered as he saw the man fall in front of him as if the world had slowed down all together. "Doctor Light!? YOU MURDERER!" shouted a scientist from the door that had just arrived to the scene. Shuryou kept staring at doctor Light and crawled slowly at him, hoping the murderer was distracted by the new scientist who had appeared. "D-Doctor Light?" Shuryou muttered as he shook the arm of Light softly, "Doctor L-Light! Stay alive please... I-I don't... I c-can't..." The doctor opened his eyes at Shuryou and suddenly coughed up some blood. Recognizing this, Shuryou stood up and looked at the criminal while sets of equipment started to shake as Shuryou's power level started to rise slowly.

"You... YOU!" he shouted as he pointed at the man, "YOU MURDERED MY FATHER!" "Heh," replied the criminal as he held his gun lazily in one hand, bungling it on one finger, "Whatchu gonna do about it, brat? The man's dead. Forget about the nerd." "NO!" shouted Shuryou as she clenched his fists, "NOOOOOOOOOO!" Parts of the equiment in the laboratory Shuryou was in exploded as the power level of Shuryou sprung around like a fire in a forest.

As Shuryou's power level kept rising, his current opponent shivering of fright, he heard doctor Light's voice from next to him on the ground. "Shooyow, you hawve weached your mawximum potentwial..." he had said softly before his light was silenced. The non-existant power level of the doctor had disappeared, making Shuryou's internal system snap in a rage of unlimited power. Disappearing from sight, only a cloud of dust remaining, he generated two blades of dark green energy as they went forth in an offensive move very quickly. Cleaving the murderer in half, the parts falling on the ground, not even capable of doing anything Shuryou just laughed. His laugh became a hollow sound from the dimension Shuryou was in, but he appeared as the laughing stopped again.

"WHERE ARE THE OTHERS!?" he shouted as stared at the entrance, engaging the power of his boots. "At the front, Shuryou, their leader was the only one who went in," the scientist said and stepped aside. But as Shuryou wanted to move out, he was stopped by the scientist as he grabbed Shuryou's arm and spoke at him, "I know we won't see you anymore after this... But keep on the good side of life." Looking at him for a few seconds, Shuryou nodded slowly and replied. "I won't use my father's heritage for wrong, I promise to the death of my father." And with these words, he had left.

"This doesn't look good!" shouted one of the criminals as he spotted Shuryou standing at the entrance, his hands still covered in blood. "Blast him, guys!" he shouted again and they started to shoot at Shuryou with machine guns. "That," said Shuryou as he disappeared and reappeared somewhere, "Won't". Disappearing again, he appeared before one of the criminals and stuck his laser claws into his chest while using him as shield for incoming bullets as he said to the dead man in his hand, "Do." Tossing the dead body at someone else, he sliced some bullets heading for him with a grin on his face when he suddenly disappeared again. After appearing behind two criminals he made a swift horizontal movement with his claws, cleaving the two in half. Before he could disappear again or notice anything incoming, he was hit by a set of bullets from a stray criminal that had hid himself. "DAMN YOU!" Shuryou shouted as he disappeared, making his voice sound hollow. Appearing above the opponent in the air, he put his hands together and collected energy within as holes appeared in his palms. "Sayonara," he muttered before a wave of energy annihilated the one that had shot him.

Staring at the remaining people who had frozen over fright, he grinned again as he slowly disappeared from their plane while his laser claws remained visible. In a flurry of movements, the claws came closer were stuck in each side of the first enemy in his paths and got ripped apart vertically. Before the ripped apart parts could even hit the ground entirely, the claws had already claimed their second victim as a claw got thrust into the face of a criminal. "You have no idea what you're dealing with," spoke a voice that was close yet far away as the claw ejected itself from the criminal's face. "Run and I will hunt," the voice continued as the claws floated close to each other and seemed ready to strike again, "Stay and you die. Either way, you die." The claws came closer slowly while Shuryou appeared again with a grin on his face. "Too late," he said as he swiftly spread his arms to the side while sending wave of energy at his energy. "KAISER FLASH!" he shouted as the wave flew out towards the remaining enemies that were cleaved by it. Standing alone now on a plane that was a battlefield, he sighed as the laser claws disappeared. "God..." he muttered as he made his Namekian part execute its regeneration to remove the bullets from his skin, "Having fun up there, eh?" Afterwards he laughed softly and turned to look at the place he was born in. "Goodbye father. We'll meet in the other plane one day," Shuryou said as he started to float slowly. A scientist ran out and started to wave at Shuryou. More followed, also waving at Shuryou and shouted 'Good luck' at him repeatedly. "HEY GUYS!" Shuryou shouted as he held his hands close to his mouth to make it sound louder, "GIVE MY OLD MAN A PROPER BURIAL!" Giving them a thumbs up, he turned around and flew off to find new adventures.

Nur hur hur. XD

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Uh...overly long?

Great job thou.

"???! WHAT DOES THE SCOUTER SAY ABOUT HIS POWER LEVEL?!"

"ITS OVER 39,000,000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"...We're fucked."

"Yup."

Do you want him to be muscular? Cause if so, he needs to weigh more.

Quote (Original)

America...
America...
America, FUCK YEAH!
Coming again, to save the mother fucking day yeah,
America, FUCK YEAH!
Freedom is the only way yeah,
Terrorist your game is through cause now you have to answer too,
America, FUCK YEAH!
So lick my butt, and suck on my balls,
America, FUCK YEAH!
What you going to do when we come for you now,
it's the dream that we all share; it's the hope for tomorrow

FUCK YEAH!

McDonalds, FUCK YEAH!
Wal-Mart, FUCK YEAH!
The Gap, FUCK YEAH!
Baseball, FUCK YEAH!
NFL, FUCK, YEAH!
Rock and roll, FUCK YEAH!
The Internet, FUCK YEAH!
Slavery, FUCK YEAH!

FUCK YEAH!

Starbucks, FUCK YEAH!
Disney world, FUCK YEAH!
Porno, FUCK YEAH!
Valium, FUCK YEAH!
Reeboks, FUCK YEAH!
Fake Tits, FUCK YEAH!
Sushi, FUCK YEAH!
Taco Bell, FUCK YEAH!
Rodeos, FUCK YEAH!
Bed bath and beyond (Fuck yeah, Fuck yeah)

Liberty, FUCK YEAH!
White Slips, FUCK YEAH!
The Alamo, FUCK YEAH!
Band-aids, FUCK YEAH!
Las Vegas, FUCK YEAH!
Christmas, FUCK YEAH!
Immigrants, FUCK YEAH!
Popeye, FUCK YEAH!
Democrats, FUCK YEAH!
Republicans (republicans)
(fuck yeah, fuck yeah)
Sportsmanship
Books

I was listening to this song and figured out... This can be MUCH better. I will rewrite it! So I decided to abuse the meme of 4Chan known as 'Seaking Fuck Yeah'. Here's my version.

Seaking...
Seaking...
Seaking, FUCK YEAH!
Coming again, to save the mother fucking day yeah,
Seaking, FUCK YEAH!
Horn Drill is the only way yeah,
Cynthia, your reign is through cause now you have to answer to,
Seaking, FUCK YEAH!
So lick my fins, and suck on my horn,
Seaking, FUCK YEAH!
What you going to do when he comes for you now,
it's the fish that we all share; it's the Pokemon for tomorrow

FUCK YEAH!

Whirlpool, FUCK YEAH!
PokeMart, FUCK YEAH!
Goldeen, FUCK YEAH!
Pokeball, FUCK YEAH!
Loli, FUCK, YEAH!
4Kids, FUCK YEAH!
GTS, FUCK YEAH!
Trainers, FUCK YEAH!

FUCK YEAH!

Hyperbeam, FUCK YEAH!
Surfing, FUCK YEAH!
Yiffing, FUCK YEAH!
Swift Swim, FUCK YEAH!
Running Shoes, FUCK YEAH!
Lorelei, FUCK YEAH!
Sushi, FUCK YEAH!
Water Veil, FUCK YEAH!
Tauros, FUCK YEAH!
Slowpoke and beyond (Fuck yeah, Fuck yeah)

Megahorn, FUCK YEAH!
Waterfall, FUCK YEAH!
Azumao, FUCK YEAH!
Potions, FUCK YEAH!
Battle Tower, FUCK YEAH!
Delibird, FUCK YEAH!
Ludicolo, FUCK YEAH!
Super Rod, FUCK YEAH!
Team Rocket, FUCK YEAH!
Team Galaxy (Rocket wins)
(fuck yeah, fuck yeah)
Pokemon Duels
Seaking

*ROFLs* Try singing this text along the original. It's amusing. It's not a lot of change, but it's still amusing to waste your time with. XD

No Mudkip and Magikarp in the last stanza?

Interesting, there are multiple ways to do that song, lets see what's next.

Your own personal DERP Squad in Diamond and Pearl!

Pokemon Party:
Unown D
Unown E
Unown R
Unown P
Unown !
Bidoof (Try making a ball capsule with DERP! coming out of it and nicknaming Bidoof the "DERPZORD" XD /lol)

Wow, I never knew that meme was THAT successful.

Also, I am SO doing that. Level 100 Bidoof tiem. Not good for anything but lulz, but lulzy all the same.

Thanks to King for providing images. XD
Thanks to Aim for the drawings. XD~

... That first image reeks of yaoi. D:
THIS CALLS FOR REVISION.
<grabs paintbrush>

This movie.

Here's a fun little story for you guys that happened today.
Me, my father and my mother were out to the cinema today to go watch Transformers. Awesome movie, by the way, go watch it now. Anyway... In a movie is a break where you can get something to snack. We did. My mom and I went to get ice cream for me and my dad. So let's show how it went...

Shur's mom: "Two chocolate chip ice cream, please."
Salesman: "Taking a single big one is cheaper, miss. You could both eat from it and it's five times bigger."
Shur's mom: "No, I'll take two small ones. Otherwise they'll fight for it."

CONCLUSION. THAT SALESMAN THOUGHT I WAS ON A DATE WITH THE WOMAN WHO IS MY MOTHER. DO YOU UNDERSTAND IT!?

THE SALESMAN.
THOUGHT.
I WAS.
ON A DATE.
WITH MY MOTHER!

I WAS HAPPY I COULD GET BACK TO MY SEAT. I WAS CONSTANTLY ROFLING! OR I LOOK GODDAMN OLD ALREADY OR MY MOM IS YOUNGER THAN SHE LOOKS! GOD! IT WAS SHEER EPIC!

He, of course, didn't know she was my mother.

ROFL!

HAHAHA!!! funny. just fucking epic shur.

Gets real funny after 12:00.

That was a great shippuden..

A NEW CHALLENGER APPEARS!



Additional Lulz.

...
I can't access your site, Lego.
EPIC WIN SHUR!