Bill N. Clusterbuck's

"You're right, you can't tell! Because an insect like you has no business trying to comprehend what goes on in the mind of a successful, multifaceted pharmaceutical company president!" Dharma snapped back, trying to make it clear to Lala that she was, after all, only a service industry girl walking around in a cow-print fetish swimsuit for this one night. Lala only went on to talk down to her bitch for the night a while longer, to which Dharma smiled back at, though not without an irritable twitch in her eyebrows. "I swear, this girl is going to such lengths to make a fool out of me, and she lacks even the imagination to decide how she is going to continue? If it was me in her position, I'd have me naked in a dark room. I'd be licking my boots clean with my tongue, laughing at me as I utterly degraded myself for my own amusement," Dharma thought to herself, before admitting to herself that it was a bit nasty to be thinking of herself in those terms.

As it turned out, Dharma was plenty upset with Lala's new terms regardless, though they were a significant step up from licking anyone's boots in a dark room. "Ha! Trivial. I once consumed the fried head of a duck in front of a table full of wealthy businessmen in a trip to Electopia. I've eaten from a entomologist's buffet of cockroaches and earthworms. I've gone skydiving over the canyons in southwestern Netopia! There's no way something like this would frighten me," she guffawed, secretly trying to convince herself that wearing the sling bikini out for the rest of the night shouldn't bother her. "After all, it's not much worse than the swimsuit I wore on my yacht... The style is similar... W-Well, it doesn't have the belt, and the bottom half isn't a legitimate bikini... so there will be a lot less coverage of the bum, being pulled as hard as it must be to keep its shape" she thought to herself, gulping again while still grinning. "Plus, if I move around too much, I could slip out of the top... Isn't there normally some paste or something one uses when they wear something like this?! The stupid girl probably doesn't even know about it!"

The second condition was almost just as terrible for her; Dharma, always a bit of a germophobe, had no desire to be near the sick Tammy, nor anything she'd coughed up, any more than she wished to put her hands in the volatile chemicals she used to make her own experimental drugs. "Oh, no. Helping sick people is my job, after all," Dharma responded. "This is all a little pedestrian for me, as I believe I've mentioned. The important part is how it all fits into the grander picture. I don't expect you to understand that, of course." "How does it fit into the grander picture, again?!" she asked herself again. "Oh, right... I just need to wait until the child and VenusMan locate that secret formula. Then I can abandon Lala's orders and leave."

Having no desire to talk to Lala any more, nor to give the girl any more chance to make demands of her, Dharma headed right past her and for the door, placing one hand on the handle. Lala could actually see the brand on her butt quite clearly for a moment, if she wanted, while Dharma hesitated, keeping her grip tight on the knob. She gathered her breath, then opened the door. She felt like sprinting as quickly as possible to the women's bathroom and shutting the door behind her, but that would draw too much attention, she though, perhaps ignoring that there would be literally no way to avoid drawing attention dressed as she was. Furthermore, any such movements would risk some form of spillage from her outfit. Instead, she opted to cross her arms at her chest in an official manner, keep her head low, and walk as fast as she could to the bathroom. She felt herself shivering slightly... the restaurant's thermostat wasn't exactly adjusted for the comfort of people running around naked. The only thing left to do was hope (not pray, Dharma didn't believe in such things) that she'd make it to the bathroom, get inside, and shut the door without anyone stopping her... and furthermore, hope that Tammy would be the only one in there.

"All right, Dharmy, I think that's enough about your peculiar eating habits~!" Lala told Dharma, having adopted her sing-song demeanor once again. "After all, we've got lots of hungry customers waiting to get dinners of their own. And speaking of dinners, why don't you run along and see how Tammy's holding onto hers?" The villainous floor lead giggled as Dharma stormed her way past, holding open the door to watch with interest as she made her way to the restroom.

Dharma wasn't exactly getting an entourage, but she could hear more than a couple of curious murmurs and gasps as she headed towards her destination. The path to the restroom was mercifully or mercilessly short, depending on which experience Dharma was less looking forward to. The pharmaceutical head arrived at the door and wasted no time getting herself out of sight.

With one task behind her, Dharma now found herself face-to-face with her next. The bathroom included two sinks and a mirror immediately around the corner, as well as a diaper changing station. Beyond that were four stalls, one of which was quite audibly occupied. It was safe to say from the grotesque sounds coming from the second from the front that Tammy wasn't handling getting jostled earlier well at all. None of the other stalls appeared to be occupied.

If Dharma was a positive thinker, she might find there was a bright side to the situation: Tammy's legs were visible below the stall, as she appeared to be sitting on her knees, but there was no sign that there'd been any kind of messy disaster. If nothing else, Tammy's aim and control seemed to be impressive, because there was no doubting that she was letting loose in the stall.

With nothing to clean up, Dharma would have to make her own decision as to whether there was even any point in hanging around... If she waited too long, it was a safe bet that somebody else would show up.

Walking around barefoot in a restaurant bathroom was already torture enough for Dharma; getting any closer to Tammy than she had now become would be a germ-riddled nightmare. Still, though, being in here with the unassuming off-duty waitress was highly preferable to parading her mostly naked self around outside, so she decided to stay in the bathroom for as long as she could justify to tend to Tammy. Thank goodness, Dharma didn't need to clean up after Tammy's barfing, but she still figured maybe her acquaintance for the night could still use some support.

The Heart-Payne Pharmaceuticals president coughed into her fist, then gently tapped on the stall door with that hand. "Excuse me, Tammy? I hear you're having some trouble in there. If you'd like, I can write you up a quick recommendation and VIP pricing coupon for Heart-Payne Upset Stomach Naus-Aid, which will take care of whatever might be troubling you," Dharma offered, smiling out of habit, although no one was watching. Hopefully, Tammy would actually be able to respond to her, but Dharma had no idea if that would turn out to be the case.

Dharma heard a gross retching noise in response, followed by Tammy's voice. "D-Dharmy...? Is that you? Oh, that's nice of you to offer, but I think I probably just need to... get back home and rest... I-I'll just be in here for a bit, and then I'll make my own way home. I'm not going to go in to my night shift, but if you don't mind, just leave my things in my locker... when your done." Tammy was trying to be polite and speak clearly, but as soon as she'd given her response, her sound effects made it perfectly clear that she was getting back to her previous business. Dharma might be enjoying some time not parading herself in front of others, but if she stuck around much longer, she'd be continuing to test her luck and Tammy's aim.

For better or worse, she didn't have to dwell long on that decision. Evidently, Lala had done her thinking quickly. Since Dharma had followed her order, she knew exactly where the pharm exec would be found, and had quickly made her way over. "Yoohoo, Dharmy! I got a great idea for what you can help with~! Where's my little cowgirl?"

Lala came skipping in, seeming, interestingly enough, completely unphased by the horrific sounds coming from Tammy's stall. Unfortunately, even if she wanted to, there wasn't much way for Dharma to hide and avoid being seen. As soon as Lala had announced herself, she'd turned the corner to make eye contact. "Thanks for keeping Tammy company, but unfortunately, work calls! I think I thought of a perfect job for you..." The shorter girl moved in closer to Dharma again, smiling broadly and keeping her eyes screwed shut. "I know all of this service industry work has been tough on you. That's why I'm giving you the opportunity to do something a bit more in line with your ordinary managerial responsibilities! See? I'm not some mean slavedriver~!" It was evident that Lala was trying to avoid sharing her nasty personality within earshot of Tammy as much as possible by the way she mouthed a silent "You b*tch" at the end of her sentence.

"It's simple, really. I'm promoting you to Guest Show Manager for the remainder of the night! I simply need you to go into the locker room, pick one of the ladies there, and help them figure out a bartop show that'll get our customers riled up. I'm sure someone with your level of imagination, innovation, and, ahem, boldness won't have any problem! And naturally, I've left you an all-star line-up of performers. Just go there, direct your favorite on what to do, and then sit back and enjoy the show yourself. Easy cheesy!"

Lala leaned in closer to Dharma, in order to talk lower. "That's more your speed, right? Giving orders to others and having them do the dirty parts? I'm interested to see if you'll take up this challenge... of course, if you don't want to... or if your show ends up being a little flat, we can always see how you handle the performance yourself." Lala gave Dharma a small grin and opened her eyes a bit, staring challengingly.

The Heart-Payne pharmaceuticals president winced, her shoulders rising and her head lurching forward, as she received nothing for her goodwill but some neglible thanks and some truly abhorrent noises of stomach illness. "V-Very good, Tammy. Please let me know if there's anything I can do to help later," Dharma finished, straightening up and heading for the door out. She figured that maybe, now that she'd cared for Tammy as she said she would, maybe she could just discretely re-dress herself and slip out the back of the restaurant. That didn't appear to be in the cards, as Lala showed up again, this time inside the lady's restroom. Dharma began to wonder whether the reason Lala was so unphased by Tammy's illness was because she'd caused it herself... that would fit right in line with the green-haired girl's role as hidden puppet-master of tonight's events. Lala's claim that a regular leadership role was up next for Dharma did nothing to calm her nerves, as she could only imagine things continuing to roll down-hill. "Never you fear! One needs both cursory planning capabilities to delegate roles effectively and a distinctly unlikeable personality in order to drive slaves, and you're quite lacking of one of those two criteria," Dharma chuckled, but delivering a mild burn to Lala wasn't going to be much consolation for her in the long run.

Hearing her next task caused Dharma to feel as though something had risen from the anxious tightness of her stomach to the moist confines of her throat; she wondered if she was starting to get whatever Tammy had. "Sounds splendid," she lied, her thoughts occupied with just what sorts of folks she was going to find in the locker room and how in the world she was supposed to organize a stage show, which she'd never seen before, even from movies... she only had the vaguest idea of how to picture one, from idle chatter she'd heard before. She tilted her head back and away as Lala closed in, continuing to match her glare and smirk, but with a nervous twinge of her eyebrows that she was unable to stop from showing. She lowered her own voice to match Lala's. "Hopefully, I'm just a bit better at giving clear and expedient orders than my own superior for the night," she returned. "This is child's play for me. It will be the same as trimming my bonsai garden or reviewing the research results of my under-studies... a practice so clear and simple, so elegantly handled by myself, that it voids the mind of all thoughts, serving as a meditative practice."

She'd hold for a bit, then exit the room in front of Lala, eager to show how little she thought of this particular order. Desperately hoping that the locker room Lala had been speaking of was the same she'd occupied previously that night, now filled with bar-girls, she made her way back in that direction, using the same quick walk she had earlier, although with a bit more feigned confidence. She'd have no chance of leading the girls if they saw her looking as grim and pessimistic as she actually felt currently. Once there, she'd open the door just enough to squeeze through and go in, just in case any of them were in states of undress that they'd rather not reveal to others.

Of course, the worst possibility was that there was another locker room somewhere intended for the show girls. If that was the case, she'd have to find it on her own... which would be a mess, seeing as she really didn't want to stand out in the open and try doors. She certainly wouldn't go back and ask Lala.

"Wow! Good to hear!" Lala said, breaking away from the pair's confrontational closeness and grinning widely. "To think, a brain as big as yours could be so quickly cleared of thoughts! That's a surprise for sure~. Well, you don't have to worry. The bunch I picked for you are all real lookers, and, of course, none of them have rumbly tummies like poor Tammy here. It ought to be so simple, a chimpanzee could do it!" Lala giggled, stepping out of the way so Dharma could head out first.

The operator might be happy to leave the nasty sounds Tammy was making behind, but she might be upset to learn she wasn't leaving Lala behind. The other girl seemed content to follow her closely as they made their way to the locker room, skipping obnoxiously and catching the eyes of anyone Dharma had been lucky enough to avoid alerting up until this point. Dharma was a woman on a mission, though, and while she had a sense there were quite a few customers eager to get their chat on with the restaurant's newest Guest Show Manager, she was able to make her way unobstructed to the changing room.

Dharma slid her way inside. To her credit, Lala did the same, evidently not as interested in putting the potential show girls' lack of preparation on display. The executive was greeted by the sight of three people:

First, a rather large, well-muscled dark-skinned woman with the classic Clusterbuck waitress outfit. There were a lot of interesting points about this potential candidate. She was turned away from Dharma, so her face was hidden, but her dark green hair, in a tight ponytail behind her head, as well as some heavy studded earrings and a plethora of tattoos across her body (many featuring skulls and guns) were on full display. If Dharma was picking based on charm points, it could be said the woman's general girth extended to her hips, which were in turn extended towards the executive. The reason why would probably be more interesting to Dharma, though, was the fact that she was currently in the act of peering into the locker where Dharma had been keeping her things...

Second, a more classic beauty with rather pale skin and glamorous, long red hair. The hair fell over her eyes and over one shoulder. This woman seemed to have all of the conventionally good measurements, and was probably a step or two above Tammy or Dharma in that regard. She was also wearing the Clusterbuck uniform, but more notably, she was wearing a look of open disdain to return Dharma's look. She made a "tch" noise and cast her eyes back to the blood-red PET that she held in her hands.

Third, a thin, Electopian character with dark brown hair cut in a bob and a large gold earring in one ear. This one had a much more elegant cut, with androgynous thin features all around. The positive trait of this option was that it was facing Dharma directly, with a confident smile that shouted "pick me!" The negative trait of this option was that it was actually not wearing a Clusterbuck uniform. Instead, it wore a lavender-colored jacket over a pink t-shirt and denim skinny jeans. The other negative trait... if one was speaking of positive traits, it still wasn't entirely clear that this was a woman. It was standing in this particular dressing room with a bunch of women, so...?

"C'mon, c'mon! No need for introductions, right?" Lala addressed Dharma with a big grin on her face. "Your managerial senses are probably being overloaded with all this ripe talent, am I right?! So, which will it be? Tell me so I can let the others get back to work."

Hearing Lala's voice, the dark-skinned woman finally spun around, clearly throwing something back into the locker and shutting it behind her. The woman's face was probably more or less what Dharma had expected: she had a chiseled appearance and bright, threatening eyes. Additionally, she had many face piercings, including two rings over the eyebrow and a stud in her tongue. The stud was only apparent because her face had seemed to be momentarily frozen into a slack-jawed expression of surprise. The woman scrambled backward against the closed locker briefly, then straightened up, then leaned against it, adopting an uninterested look and scowl that seemed to fit her basic appearance more closely.

The other two women seemed to ignore this, and basically kept the same levels of attentiveness: the red-headed woman kept checking her PET, and the dark headed woman(?) kept looking at Dharma expectantly.

Dharma had really, really, really, really, really, reeeeeally hoped Lala had somewhere else to be and was, for the lack of a better word, revolted to find that the floor host didn't. Ironically, the more Lala managed the situation as Dharma herself might in her place, the more Dharma thought she was a truly petty and despicable person. "Come now, if you're just going to follow me around all night, shouldn't you just have managed this yourself?" she asked in a low whisper, holding her fists at her side and trying to stop them from trembling with her growing irritability at the situation. It was doubtful that pointing out the logical inconsistency of Lala's management style was going to make her green-haired tormenter ease up.

Thankfully, the two were just headed back to the same locker room they'd been in earlier. Dharma would not be so thankful for the talents she'd been offered, as, besides having no introductions for any of the three, each had (at least) one attribute which seemed like it would make it difficult for her to be confident in them. As cocky as she was acting, Dharma knew that she was going to need as much help as she could get pulling off this act and avoiding the fate of having to take the spotlight herself; she had a pretty strong hunch that Lala was not kidding about holding that threat over her head. She decided to analyze each of the girls one by one, make a list of their strengths and weaknesses inside her head, and then pick the best candidate for the job.

The first woman had the benefit of looking like she belonged in a sleezy dance (Dharma doing a bit of stereotyping), although her research showed that men didn't necessarily like such tough looking women. Then again, her research did show that there was a certain clientele for women who looked like they were likely to do dirty things, and tongue piercings certainly implied such intent, whether they ought to or not. Dharma certainly wouldn't hire her for a position on her research team or... anywhere else in her company... being as covered in tattoos and piercings, but she might be just the ticket for something like this.

The second was a lot closer to the "ideal" that she'd researched and based Phero on, in terms of proportions and overall appearance. On the other hand, she was missing the one thing that was most important in her construction of Phero: a tendency to smile. Then again, the first girl didn't seem to have that either. But still... already dealing with Lala, Dharma thought that she might go crazy dealing with another person who came into the picture with a huge grudge already against her. For looks, though, she was probably the easiest choice.

The third candidate was... interesting. Dharma didn't think she'd met a lot of people that looked like her (or really, like most of the girls in this room). She was the only one wearing a smile, which was a big positive in her favor, but she was also the only one missing two other big, obvious factors, unless the jacket was doing a splendid job hiding them. Dharma couldn't help but be tempted by the prospect of working with someone who genuinely seemed to want to do this, though.

After weighing the positives and negatives, Dharma found herself suddenly throwing out everything she'd just considered with the revelation of one much more important fact: the dark girl had been digging through her locker with a face that looked, just for a moment, properly afraid. Fear was good: Dharma could work with fear and often did... although it also begged the question of whether the girl was afraid of her or Lala. If the answer was Lala, Dharma would make sure that she shifted the weight of the girl's anxiety towards herself as quickly as possible. On the other hand, she might catch more flies with honey, as they say... she might work that angle until she needed to do otherwise, since she could always correct into frightening her if necessary. Dharma was probably the only person in the world who would currently be thinking of how easy to manipulate a woman like this was... fortunately, boldness in the face of adversity was not a trait the Heart-Payne Pharmaceuticals CEO could ordinarily be said to lack.

Also, there was the possibility the girl was stealing something from her locker. That needed to be investigated as well.

"Her," Dharma finally spoke, pointing at the tattooed woman with one thin, bare arm. "Nothing against the two of you. I'm sure you'd make fine performers," she finished, giving a polite smile to the others and leaning by the door, in case they were both going to exit now. Raising her eyebrows, she turned her attention back to her chosen candidate. "I'm sorry if it's an inconvenience to you, but as you may have noticed, I've already placed my things into that locker. I'm going to take a quick inventory of them before I begin. Please excuse me," she began, walking slowly towards the locker with both arms crossed and a pleasant expression, one which hid her intention to see if the woman would come forth and reveal that she'd stolen something before they got started. In another fine bit of stereotyping based on the woman's appearance, Dharma was about 80% confident she'd find her wallet missing. There was also the possibility that the woman, for some reason, had an interest in Dharma as the CEO of Heart-Payne pharmaceuticals, perhaps as an agent for a rival company... which would present an interesting business scenario to Dharma, if also making things further complicated.

"Silly Dharmy! Keeping all of the floor staff in line while showing my kooky rooky the ropes is a full time endeavor. Besides, you look like a much better fit for the show.~" Lala giggled with an air of menace before they entered, following up the thinly-veiled reminder of her earlier threat.

That said, Lala really only looked interested in hanging around until Dharma made her pick. Once she had done so, Lala quickly began shooing the others out, presumably back to work. The red-head didn't have much of a reaction to being picked at all. The other looked like he or she was distraught, and was about to plead his or her case. Dharma might suspect that Lala's real intention was not to be around when it was time to ask the important questions, like "How am I supposed to do this?" or "How do you normally do this?" or "How long am I supposed to do this for?"

Her departure left Dharma and the dark-skinned woman alone. The employee remained more or less stone-faced at the fact that she was picked, but let out a breath she'd been holding in as soon as the others left and Dharma made it clear searching her belongings came first. "I'm Limbikani, but maybe just call me Connie for short. Most people do. Look, I had no idea that you were storin' your stuff here... it's Tammy's locker, so I was just... lookin' to borrow something." The woman seemed like she remained distant effortlessly, but Dharma did catch her eyes tracking away during her explanation.

Dharma's search, no matter how thorough, would thankfully reveal everything still accounted for. That was something of a miracle, considering, if nothing else, Lala's open disdain for the pharmaceutical executive. That said, there were a couple of things shifted around... and if Dharma was thinking sharp and paying attention to small details, she'd probably catch that her undergarments were clearly the thing which had been tossed in a rush as Connie was turning around. "I guess you probably wouldn't get it, girls borrowin' other girls' things, but... normal locker room stuff. Trust me."

The woman shifted on her feet, switching which leg she had crossed over the other. "Anyway, I'm guessin' you won't believe it, but I'm actually the safest choice here. One of those chicks hates your guts, although I figure you knew that... that other one, pretty sure he wasn't even a chick, and he definitely wasn't an actual employee."

Now frowning, the woman gave Dharma a somewhat pained-looking expression that seemed to be her default. "Not sure what Lala's up to. That said... I don't exactly have a lotta experience in stage shows. I mean... I guess I have a little bit of knowledge, but just working knowledge. You some kind of expert on it?" The woman looked Dharma over, then cast her eyes away. "I mean... your body's pretty much right for it, but you don't strike me as the type. You know the bars here don't even have poles on 'em, right? Not quite sure what kinda bar show you two were envisioning..."

Connie shook her head, turning back to Dharma. "Sorry. Not tryin' to have a quitter attitude. Just sayin', you've been given a pretty thin bit to work with. What do you have in mind?" The woman seemed awfully composed in trying to make conversation, but Dharma might be more interested in grilling her new acquaintance on why her panties had been a target of interest, especially if the wide-hipped woman thought she was going to "borrow" something of Tammy's. It would take a lot of imagination to put Tammy into any outfit that fit Connie.

"Good to meet you, Connie," Dharma began, surprised to find the intimidating looking woman was pretty plain-spoken. She wasn't sure if she liked that or not... she had a pretty good idea that this Limbikani woman had a good idea of who she was, but the worker didn't appear intimidating, exactly. "Well, as you can see, I'm currently borrowing what Tammy had to offer," she joked, uncertain of whether Connie had realized that already or not.

The CEO gave her locker a quick once-over, to see if Connie was just playing the role of smooth criminal, but it didn't seem as though anything was missing. She noticed Connie had been looking through her underwear... "Ugh, is it even a possibility that I've ended up alongside another woman with a perverse interest in me?" she asked herself with a mental-only scowl, remembering another woman who had attempted to ambush her and pull her clothes off in an Electopian bath before. That was pretty much what she remembered, although it had actually been her stumbling around that had caused most of the scene. For now, she'd choose to believe that Connie had only been interested in her panties because they would, undoubtedly, fetch a superb price on whatever market one managed to legally sell them upon. "Don't worry, I didn't make my choice willy-nilly," Dharma reassured her co-worker. "I declined the others for those exact reasons." That wasn't quite right... she'd declined the thin guy because he wasn't currently snooping through her goods, looking suspicious only in a relatively inconsequential way, compared to Connie.

It was now time for Dharma to break some unfortunate news: "I have a lot of management experience, of course. That said, I'm not exactly familiar with floor shows... Is anyone here?" she asked, smiling inquisitively. She honestly wanted to know, because she wasn't entirely sure how anyone would even hold a floor show here, unless they were going to... dance on the pool tables or something. Dharma had only the most cursory knowledge of how a night-dancer ought to operate, so she could only piece together bits and pieces from movies. She remained relatively unswayed as Connie complimented(?) her body, which was natural; this wasn't the first time she'd heard that people were interested, as they were right to be. Dharma held an ongoing interest in examining the abstract concept of 'love' with her own experiences as well as her navi's, after all, and it would be difficult to achieve any kind of research if she didn't keep up with her appearance. That, and it was pretty important if you were going to look down on others to look good yourself, in turn. "However! I am a visionary and you are, as you said, not a quitter. We'll come up with a fine show together." Dharma didn't have a lick of interest in coming up with a fine show; just one that could be performed without her having to give a guy a lapdance while dressed in a cow-print slingshot of thin fabric, hopefully.

The pharmaceuticals company president's face went from a cocky smile to a look of pensive contemplation as she thought over what she'd seen so far. She self-consciously reached back to touch the "brand" on her backside, one of the worst parts of the night so far... It was annoying, but it did give her an idea. If even that salty, grumbling old codger had brightened up at stamping her bottom, there was a pretty good chance that was the sort of thing guys around here liked to do. "Let's put our heads together... I'm going to need to ask you a few questions to stir my imagination. Let me ask you first: what do you think about the concept of allowing the men around here to use that ink mark, er... this one," she murmured, turning around to show Lala the spot where she'd been stamped on the butt, "during your show? It seems to be something we could use, given that the birthday guy I entertained earlier highly enjoyed it. But from a marketability standpoint, I don't know if it's good to give too many out. Well, you've been working here longer than I have, so you could probably say," she urged Connie. "Another question: what does Tammy ordinarily wear this outfit for?" Dharma finished, stretching one of her shoulder straps slightly to inspect it, causing her chest and buttocks to rise along with it; that proved to be pretty uncomfortable, so she let it snap back immediately, wincing slightly at the sting.

"O-oh," Connie muttered a bit awkwardly, apparently having not realized Dharma's outfit belonged to Tammy. "So, she's... wearing that, I see. Yeah, I think I get it." The woman coughed and turned to look at some particularly interesting nothing over her right shoulder. She remained silent for a while longer, seeming oddly pensive.

"I'm not real familiar with the other girls here, but if I'd be surprised if there weren't some with experience. Too bad Tammy's the only one I know," Connie finally commented, looking off to the side in a distracted way again. "I think she's out sick today. Anyhow, we probably know enough to wing it. Seein' any kinda show will be enough for the guys who normally just come here for wings, beer, and pretty women to serve 'em."

Connie didn't jump both feet first into the brainstorming, preferring to let Dharma pitch the ideas and respond. She stared at Dharma blankly when the other started talking to her about the ink stamp, and raise her eyebrows when it was actually shown to her. It seemed like she had something she wanted to say immediately, but she let Dharma finish her thought, instead. "Uh, yeah... I mean, I'm sure there are some guys that would enjoy it. Not as many as would enjoy putting a hand or, uh... somethin' else to it, but they'd get a kick out of it."

She lowered her eyebrows, looking frustrated as Dharma continued (although that could just be a way she tended to look). "Time out a sec. You do know this stuff isn't regularly used here, right? I'm one hundred percent certain Tammy uses this stuff for her job at the Silver Saloon. She works a shift immediately after this as a stripper at that club, and I-" The woman suddenly cut off, gasping and seeming to reign in some excitement she'd been building up. "At least, uh, that's what I've heard her tellin' other people. Overheard. In passing."

The woman seemed to want to stay quiet and lost in her thoughts, but after a moment, she spoke up again. "If Tammy was wearing something like that... I'd guess she'd probably do a pole dance." The woman stayed quiet for a while longer, continuing to stare sidelong at nothing as she clenched her teeth. "Yeah, well, that doesn't help us much now, does it? Actually, now that I think about it," the woman asked, turning back to Dharma a bit sharply now, "Why are we even talking about your outfit? Wait, am I performing in something like that...?" Gulping down what was obviously a bit of apprehension, the woman set her face straight again and tried to change her pitch. "What I mean is, we don't have a bunch of those kinda outfits runnin' around. Unless you know something I don't, what I'm wearing now is gonna have to be good enough for the performance."

Dharma raised one eyebrow at Connie's response, wondering just where exactly Connie thought she had gotten this outfit from if not from Tammy. "I certainly didn't bring it in myself," she scoffed, internally. "I see... Well, Tammy aside, I think you may be right about the clients here," the president-turned-show-organizer nodded. While part of that was in the same context that Connie meant it, the other context was that Dharma thought the masses tended to be pretty easily pleased in general, giving that they had no real metric of what important, intelligent people like herself valued. She smirked a bit as Connie mentioned the sorts of things men might rather do to her butt than stamp it; the mere idea of anyone being so bold as to do so was ludicrous. "Yes, well, I'm sure they'll be happy with what they're given," she responded, crossing her arms and shrugging her shoulders in an unconcerned expression.

Her eyes screwed up in further confusion, however, once Connie clarified to her that Clusterbuck didn't ordinarily even hold a floor show; it must have been another of Lala's endless, elaborate, tiresome schemes intended to demean her (and this time, dragging down another girl with her). With the benefit of hindsight, she realized that she'd picked up several context clues throughout the night that should have lead her to realize this already. In addition, it was becoming clear that Connie was one of two things: a good friend of Tammy's or Tammy's stalker. It didn't really matter to Dharma which, but the latter would make it significantly more uncomfortable, knowing that she was wearing Tammy's stripper underwear for the rest of the night. "You're right, the poledance is off the table," she sighed, resting her head upon her hand idly. She stayed quiet for a moment longer, then opened her eyes again. "Hm, I'd have figured that Lala would give us something for you to wear, but she can hardly be expected to-" she murmured, wanting to say "steal another" but correcting herself for the sake of not revealing her spitefulness, "come up with a new ensemble for something as new as this."

Dharma had to admit two facts to herself. The first was that a spicier, fresher outfit would definitely help Connie captivate the audience, which would be good to have as a safety net; she didn't want this to fail, or else, she could end up taking the stage (metaphorical, there was no real stage) on her own. The other important fact was that whatever Connie was going to wear, it couldn't be the sling bikini; getting that off would most likely mean getting naked in front of Connie, and Dharma was 100% not okay being 100% naked around others, as she'd recently proven to herself. "The way I see it, the easiest thing to do would be to use the rest of Tammy's Silver Spoon outfit that Lala made me take-" she began, then realized that divulging the fact that Lala had forced her to strip earlier would make her sound very submissive, which was not how she wanted to be viewed right now "-all of the components of earlier, for use later on in the night. You could simply wear all of those pieces over your underwear, couldn't you? I'd imagine that would make a serviceable costume," she offered. "I should clarify: some of the items in there are part of a costume and some parts are my regular clothing." It would be hard for the casual observer to say which was the costume and which were the regular clothing, given that the "regular clothing" included a pitch-black lab coat with a taser in it.

Now, all that was left for Dharma to do was think up the actual act. It would need to be something one could do with no pole, no stage, no production values at all, really... No easy feat. While she thought, she turned her eyes back up to Connie. "Please, go ahead and get changed," she requested, wholly disregarding the idea that Connie might not be quite comfortable with stripping down to her underwear in front of her. On the bright side (if Connie considered it such), Dharma seemed pretty uninterested in watching. "I've actually done a lot of research on how to inspire the feeling of 'love' in others, so I'm fairly confident that I can give you the right coaching to make the clientele happy with whatever we manage to cobble together. I can tell you right away, and this is not a criticism of you but a necessity of our business, I must insist that you try your best to smile." If Connie knew who Dharma was, that statement might seem eerie; if Connie didn't, it would make Dharma sound either like she'd been reading some self-help books or was a prostitute. "Well, wait a moment before you put the things on again. It's probably best if I give you an inspection first, since it might affect my planning."

The other woman continued to remain quiet and mostly stuck with the same natural frown as Dharma considered the parameters available to her. However, her eyebrows lowered in an expression of disquiet as Dharma mentioned the outfit. "Y-you think I should wear Tammy's outfit? Uh..." The woman seemed to have major apprehension about the idea, and simply stood pensively for a moment, biting her finger. Finally, she poked her head inside the locker, still frowning, and drew out the denim skirt from earlier.

Sighing deeply, Connie made a point of, without removing any of her other outfit, unzipping the skirt and attempting to fit it around her waist. That turned out to be a futile effort: it had been tight and skimpy on Dharma, but attempting to fit it around Connie's hips looked perilous. She could pull it to, but it was clear that the zipper would never go up.

"I've got these shoulders, too," Connie told Dharma. She didn't need to clarify, as she was clearly referring to their somewhat squared shape and broad set. "I hate to say it, but as for pieces in here that will fit me... The coat's big, so I might be able to make that work, but unless you're really tryin' to put the strap to me, these other pieces aren't gonna happen. That'd leave me with pretty much just the coat and my underwear, so I don't really know how we'd put on an appropriate show... Uh, I guess I need to show you that too, huh...?"

The woman returned the garments she'd been holding to the locker and dressed down quickly. She stepped out of her boots, whipped off her belt, and pulled down her uniform shorts. This revealed more tattoos, as well as the woman's (perhaps surprisingly) plain, dark purple panties. They fit her well and had a mature look, but they might not have a "wow" factor like Dharma may have been hoping. Notably, she also revealed some more tattoos with this action. It didn't take a lot of imagination to guess that they probably continued even past the underwear to the more obscene areas. She was also wearing short black socks. Those probably weren't a part of the uniform.

The woman whipped off her shirt as well, revealing an average-sized chest with a bra to match the panties. "I dunno if you need to see me with the hair down. If you do, no problem, but if not, I'd just as well leave it on... it isn't easy to get this into place. But yeah, while I'm sure your coachin' is A+, I'm not a hundred percent certain if we're going to get those guys' hearts racin' with me in a lab coat. Might be better if I just did the usual Clusterbuck outfit. Wouldn't that be enough...?" Dharma might be thinking to herself that Connie's protests here weren't very sympathetic to her own plight.

The woman put on a smile, probably just to show Dharma she could. It was a playful but somewhat unenthusiastic smirk which threatened to break into a very small grin, but it at least looked like it belonged on her face. Dharma might have been hoping for something more smiley or raunchier, but again, it at least looked realistic.

Dharma was forced to face the harsh reality of Connie's words, as there was no way that the outfit Lala had given her, which was tight on her, would fit Connie, who was broader just about everywhere than Dharma was. She had to agree that a lab coat and underwear would seem pretty thematically disjointed (although some people might like the costume-like appearance, but she couldn't really comprehend that personally), so that was off the table as well. The pharmaceutical company president felt increasingly uncomfortable as she watched the other woman undress, revealing more skin and more tattoos; the lips framing her smile twitched slightly. "We'll work with what we're given, then. You can at least wear the black hat with your uniform, I suppose?" she offered, pointing to the dark cowboy hat she'd been wearing earlier, which had completed her sadist cowboy look. "That will make you stand out a little bit, perhaps." As if having a full body's worth of tattoos and being a muscular girl in a sea of barbie dolls didn't already do that.

Lowering her eyebrows, Dharma thought deeply about what kind of show they could possibly perform for the crowd that would entertain without asking her to get involved herself. "I don't have a lot of bar or restaurant experience, to be honest, but I do understand there are games that are popular in these sorts of places. Throughout Netopia, for instance, they like to play quiz games at bars. We might be able to try that... For instance, I read out questions to the audience and you survey the audience for whoever puts up their hand first, take their answer, and if it's right, you let them stamp your bottom? It seems like something simple they might enjoy," she shrugged. "Or, if you don't think the stamp is good, you can instead offer... Er..." she murmured, trying to come up with something good but failing. After all, she hadn't really liked the stamping itself; the only reason it seemed decent to suggest now was because she'd already been through it herself. "Well... I'm sure you can think of something?" she asked, raising her eyebrows and smiling wider, in an expression that said "good luck" and offered little useful. "I could offer prizes in the form of discount coupons for my products, although they'd be a little awkward for this crowd. They'd have monetary value, though... I don't know, it's easier and cheaper if we just offer them your butt instead," she murmured, pressing one fist to her mouth; it might be considered remarkable how little Dharma seemed worried about the prospect of throwing her charge to the wolves like that.

"Regardless! The game will be secondary to how you carry yourself," she coughed, raising one finger and attempting to stress the point again. "Your smile will be key. That one is fine; it looks real, which people appreciate," she encouraged Connie, despite the fact that something seemed remarkably fake about her own smile. "My research has taught me a lot of other useful pointers as well. I'd recommend that for this sort of crowd, you joke where you're able, and also act approachable, even promiscuous. Those fellows won't like it if you act like you're out of their league, even if you are," she chuckled; again, somewhat ironic, considering her constant propensity for acting holier-than-thou, or at least thinking that way. "Do you have a PET? If so, I can have my navi send you pointers along and along... Speaking of which, who is your navi? Are they perhaps someone who could assist with this as well, maybe offering us other options through the use of a video screen or hologram?" Dharma asked, realizing she should have thought to ask that particular question a lot sooner. She also offered no information on her own navi, despite asking for Connie's.

Connie shrugged and began redoing her shirt. "Yeah, I think that's the right call. I dunno if my appearance is gonna hurt the performance so much as the lack of production values, though..." With her shirt back on, the woman grabbed the dark hat and turned it over in her hands. Seeming to judge it would fit her head, the woman removed her hairband and let her hair fall back in a straight, shoulder-length curtain, the bangs still pulled back from her forehead. She shook her head once and let them fall more naturally. The woman put the hat onto her head and listened further, pausing mid-dress.

She put one fist to her chin, listening to Dharma with a wide frown. "Huh... a quiz game sounds good, but the stampin' thing... I mean, I don't think that's gonna be a winner without a getup like yours, and even still, that might get boring for 'em after a while. I hear part of the novelty of it at the Silver Saloon is that you only get to do it on your birthday. Anyway, with the quiz games I've heard of, rather than a prize a pop, they normally keep score... so the big payout is at the end. It might be better to think of a general way for me to entertain to start, and then some nice prize I can give the lucky winner. It might also be a good idea to limit the number of people participating... pick some participants from the audience at the start." The woman didn't react to tell Dharma the coupons were a bad idea, but she wasn't denying the possibility of "offering them her butt" instead. She was probably leaving it to Dharma to figure that out with the direction she proposed.

"You should probably know I work as a bartender... I can turn on some conversational charm, but I don't really know about actin'." The woman frowned more deeply for a moment, before putting her smile back on. She turned around, putting her back to Dharma, and leaned down to grab her leg with one arm while grabbing the rim of her hat with the other. "How's that, sugah?" she said, her eyes cast back to Dharma. Her grin widened a bit before disappearing into her usual dark expression. She stood straight again, looking frustrated. "Do you think 'sugah' is too much? There's another girl here that does that, and she seems pretty popular."

Lost momentarily in her own thoughts, Connie suddenly spoke up again. "If your Navi can offer any help, I'd sure be glad to take it. I don't think my Navi's gonna be especially useful for this. He's a big oaf, but more than that, he doesn't really have any romantic or erotic sense. However, he can probably at least help us hook up with the speakers on our half of the restaurant, and let you speak into your PET as a microphone." Seeing the need, Connie went ahead and started punching in commands to a black, skull-adorned PET she was carrying on her belt. "That much is probably a bare minimum of presentation value you need."

That last note seemed to put Connie in a frustrated mindset again, and she rested her lip on a fist. "Y'know, this whole thing seems off. I know Lala told us you were managing this as an amateur guest celebrity, but even if you were a pro, this feels doomed to fail. A 'bar show' for a bar this size should at least have multiple girls, and... now that I think about it, are you gonna do this dressed like that?" The woman looked up, appearing angry (but thankfully revealing that to just be an appearance, seeing as her voice was still even). "If you go out in that, and me in this," she said, indicating her current state of dress and apparently forgetting she still wasn't wearing pants, "there's no way guys are going to buy that I'm the prize and you're the quiz show hostess only. Are you, uh... required to wear that as the guest floor show manager...?"

Dharma knit her eyebrows; she was certainly not the most experienced manager when it came to instructing girls on how to entertain horny bar guys, nor the most motivated, so the repeated need to exercise her creative muscle was beginning to take its toll on her. "If you don't think the stamping will work, then the best option might be to, as you say, simply keep score and promise a big prize at the end," she responded, closing her eyes thoughtfully. "To narrow down the list of participants, we'll pick some volunteers out of the crowd, as you said. Let's say... three. Pick whichever folks are your type," she chuckled, a seemingly good-natured joke. "Rather than reward each question, we'll simply promise them something special towards the end. Like... erm... can you do a lapdance? Music is one of the few luxuries of production that seems easy enough to acquire, especially if we have use of the speakers, so that seems like it would make the most sense," Dharma suggested, unable to picture anything else. "Nothing fancy, of course."

If Connie was hoping she was going to get some genuine interest out of Dharma with her sexy pose, she'd be disappointed, as Dharma was nothing if not uninterested in other people to an uncanny extent, let alone in their capacity as sexy posers. "That looks good. You should keep 'sugah' too, as it also feels familiar, and therefore flattering," she agreed, although just saying the word once made her feel queasy. "My navi is busy herself, right now, but we can still use the PET to communicate," Dharma clarified, unsure of what her navi was actually doing at the moment. Her eyebrows lowered and her smile fell into a calm, patient look as Connie continued, asking whether Dharma planned to offer her own butt, so to speak, for their mutual cause. "Well, yes, I'm required to wear this, but... I was thinking, you know, I might leave the show portion to you, and I would simply stay back here and handle the mic work." That had been her plan, but she had to admit it sounded kind of ridiculous hearing it now. "Honestly, we might have to do it that way, because I believe I've been forbidden to put on any additional clothes besides what I'm wearing. Given that this is my 'uniform' for the night," she laughed, giving a look back over it herself that caused her own face to redden a bit. "So if I go out as well, both you and I are going to end up with some heavy expectations for the night, I believe."

Still, thinking on it now, she realized how ridiculous that sounded and was unable to avoid it. "I suppose that does seem a bit ridiculous, seeing as I already have only one woman to work with and the oh-so-gracious Lala provided me with this outfit, almost surely for the purpose of further stimulating the crowd. Er... I'll recommend this: how about you proceed with the act as though there is only one of us, then late in the game, announce that the grand prize will include both yourself and a mystery girl? It makes me sound a bit egotistic, wanting to be a 'mystery girl,' but the audience will blow out early if I do the whole quiz show out there with you, wearing just this. Of course, so that we match, you'll probably have to go down to your underwear when we give out the prize. That's regrettable, but it will be a bit ill-fitting if we do otherwise. Does all of that sound okay?" she asked again, crossing her arms with her usual expression of feigned care. In reality, she was wondering now what she'd just agreed to... She wasn't entirely sure that Connie had any idea how to do a lapdance, and she sure as heck didn't know.

Connie nodded along further, but tensed her eyebrows when Dharma mentioned picking out three of her "type." "Uh... pick three. Got it," she summarized. "And... a lap dance. Not a hundred percent confident... I'll improvise," she concluded, still looking frustrated. She didn't seem particularly affected by Dharma's revelation that she hadn't planned on going out. "No, I just mean from a practical standpoint... it feels like Lala's not being terribly flexible in terms of what she's giving you to work with. Anyway, your plan sounds fine." Realizing that perhaps neither of them truly believed that, the woman added, "I guess," as an afterthought.

Dharma's coworker did seem to be showing the first bit of sweat she'd allowed on her normally cool demeanor, and from the timing, it was not hard to imagine it coincided with being told she was expected to strip down for her performance. "... I guess it's probably going to be okay. I'll leave it in your hands. Count on me for my part." Stiffly, the woman bent down and pulled her shorts back up, then redid her belt. She handed her PET to Dharma. "You don't have to actually interact with my Navi, just tell him when you want the mic on and you can just speak into it."

Connie sighed, seeming as though she was trying to psyche herself up. She remained blank for a moment longer as she placed the dark cowboy hat on her head. "... Uh, now that I think about it," she finally spoke, "not that I'm complaining either way, but is there some kinda bonus associated with-"

Lala chose that moment to practically kick down the door, storming in with a big grin on her face. "Strategy meeting over, Dharmy?~ I went ahead and got a crowd to the bar to let them know you had a special show in store for them! Aren't I proactive? I trust you to are all ready steady and chummy wummy?"

Connie didn't reply, simply turning to Dharma and giving a small nod of her head.

"The two of us can accomplish anything we put our minds to! You can believe that, at least," Dharma encouraged Connie, sounding obsequiously optimistic. Unfortunately, she really only believed that about herself, but she was at least pleasantly pleased with Connie's willingness to bend to pressure so far. Connie's own hesitation proved to be infectious, however, and Dharma found herself raising one hand, signalling for her co-worker to wait a moment... something was clearly escaping her. "Oh, wait... I'm being foolish," she giggled, although the realization bothered her more than she let on. "You can hold on to my PET and I'll hold on to yours to use the microphone, as you said."

Her smile widened a bit as Connie mentioned a potential bonus; she was about to say "I suppose that's up to Lala," when the devil herself popped into the room herself, in as noisy a way as possible. "Yes, we're done composing our plan," she murmured, not mentioning that 'show' wasn't exactly the best word for what she had in mind. A lapdance without practice was one thing, but a 'show' without training was another entirely. "Chummy wummy. Sure." There was a high likelihood that any Heart-Payne employee even closely emulating Lala's speech pattern in Dharma's presence was going to be facing a pink slip from the company president for weeks to come. "Let's get in the saddle, so to speak. Well, er, you go on ahead Connie. I'll explain our intentions to our manager here."

Once Connie had gone on ahead, or whether she hadn't, Dharma would close the door and begin speaking; either pleasantly, if Connie was still around, or with unmasked scorn, if she wasn't. "You've left us with so few resources that a 'show' is almost out of the question. Instead, we're going to hold a quiz session, as is normal for a lot of establishments like this. Once we get to the end and someone accumulates enough points, we'll give the winner a prize in the form of a personal dance from myself and Connie. It's simple, but hopefully effective. I don't know what you were looking for, but that's what you're getting," she finished, crossing her arms defiantly. Undoubtedly, Lala had something flashier in mind (or at least more degrading to Dharma personally). "It would be nice if you'd look into giving Connie an appropriate bonus for this as well. She's doing a lot more than you are, tonight." Again, not out of empathy, but more for the desire to insult Lala and, of course, to make sure none of the blame came back to her for this from Connie, if she could help it.

Connie had left through the only door, leaving Dharma and Lala alone to their jousting. As a result, Lala had no problem opening her narrow eyes to regard Dharma with suspicion. "Well, so sorry we can't exactly break the bank to give you your preferred production values, Dharmy. I'd probably complain, but hey... if you're putting yourself on the slab at the end of it, it sounds totally fine to me! We'll see how the crowd likes it, and we'll... improvise..." she said, putting a hand to Dharma's back, "... As necessary," she finished, giving Dharma's unfortunate single item of clothing a twang across the tight cord it formed just below her shoulder blades.

"As for Connie," Lala continued, turning her back and walking away, "I'll get it out in the open, since it hasn't come to pass. I was kinda hoping she'd, like, clobber you, either for wearing her gal pal's stuff, for making her demean herself, or just cause she looks so p*ssed-at-the-world, but whatever. She's actually a good girl, huh? I don't guess you've got a conscience that makes you pay attention to those kinds of things! Otherwise, you might really be bothered about putting her through what you are. Oh, well. You've got bigger things to worry about for right now."

Lala smiled and spun, making her way back to the door. "Speaking of, Dharmy, are you planning on going out there? Don't want to keep those boys waiting..." The floor lead didn't bother responding to the notion of Connie getting a bonus, but simply disappeared through the door with a grin like a Cheshire cat.

With that done, Dharma found herself alone... she might need to think about how she was planning to do the quiz calling from in here. If she didn't have an idea, she might ask Connie (or, heaven forbid, Lala) for help.

Connie herself had made her way out, gulping as she got a look at the crowd Lala had managed to so helpfully summon on the patron's side of the bar. She made her way over there as casually as she could, swinging her hips with the ease of practice, but still gulping down her trepidation.

Dharma couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at Lala's suggestion that there was even a remote possibility that the crowd wouldn't be pleased, having a chance to enjoy such an intimate affair with a charismatic world-leader such as herself... although, she was equally hopeful that no one would recognize her true identity. A comfortable middle ground would be if they were all in awe of her raw charisma, but failed to identify her by name. The president-turned-lapdancer tensed up as Lala's hand touched onto her back, fiddling with one of the few, ever-precarious pieces of her immodest suit. "Well, you're as poor a judge of character as I would have expected. I have an eye for capability and malleability both in my employees; it's served me well throughout all the years. If you're caught on basic traits such as appearance or assumptions of personality, you'll never be able to find out the real indicators that signify the greatest talents," she boasted, turning her nose up.

As Lala began stepping away, Dharma shook her head again. "No, that would ruin the surprise. Come now, you may be crass, but must you lack even the most pedestrian understanding of showmanship, a concept with which even street performers are well acquainted? My PET is configured to act as a remote monitor if I so choose, to be shared with another PET such as the one I'm holding now. I'll watch all of the details from there while handling the quiz. All I have to do is ask... this navi... to send a request to my PET, after which, I will have full control over this petty bar show." By this point, Lala was shutting the door, so she wouldn't bother elaborating further. The main problem with that plan was that Lala was already making her way out and Dharma had yet to so much as acquaint herself with her new navi companion yet. She activated the PET as soon as she could decipher how to do so, then smiled into the screen, hoping she wasn't going to have to explain her wardrobe yet again. "Greetings there! Your operator is currently assisting me with an operation. A game, that is. If you could be so dear as to patch me through to the PET of a navi named Phero... here is the address for my HP Pharmaceuticals PET... then we can begin. I'll also ask that you activate whichever program allows me to link into the overhead microphones in this establishment, so that I can begin our quiz game," she continued. Hopefully this would go off without a hitch, because Connie was probably well into and amongst the restaurant patrons by this point.

If the navi replied that the microphones and link were operational, she'd test them out, seeing if she could indeed see out of her PET's screen and utilize the microphone connected to the restaraunt's speakers.

Lala didn't give Dharma the pleasure of a rise out of any of her barbs. Chances were, the devious floor lead had set up this whole business fully expecting Dharma's show to fall on its face. If that was true, then she was probably waiting, biding her time for when she'd get her biggest laughs at Dharma's expense.

Once Lala had made her exit, Dharma would be happy to find that the Navi in the PET was, at least, responsive and not ostensibly up to either laughing or mischief. That said, it wasn't easy to tell what she was looking at. The Navi didn't fit in the frame at all: the only parts that were visible were a huge metal half-mask with a sculpted face on the left side, and an eerie yellow eyeball alight in a long, sullen, tan face covered in tattoo-like markings. The initial impression it would probably give was that he was very large, but it was equally possible (actually, more likely) that the zoom was just screwed up. "Don't know what Limbikani is doing." The Navi's voice was a deep baritone, but clear. "Don't know who you are. Don't care. Navi does Navi work. Operator does what Operator does."

Dharma might have liked that arrangement (assuming her ego wasn't hurt by the Navi's professed indifference towards her), but she might be bothered by the Navi's passing seconds of silence when given his command. "Know microphone program," he began, which might sound alarming phonetically. Luckily, the Navi clarified by bringing an icon up on the screen, obscuring one corner of his mask. "Speaker icon. Operator push, talk from speakers in front of restaurant. Music program," he continued, presenting another icon that looked like a musical note. "Limbikani request program that play music from speakers. Push to play music. Music recommend by sound system Navi, not PiercingMan."

Having just inadvertently introduced himself, PiercingMan continued with a third icon. This one looked like a little silhouette of a person looking at another little silhouette in a PET shape. "Operator remote PET camera access. Can see out of PET. Don't think can see into PET to see Navi. Don't know; don't care. Not what Operator want program for. Uh... Other side can see Operator in PET." It wasn't clear how much of this Connie had arranged beforehand and how much PiercingMan was responsible for.

"Activate now. New Operator, Limbikani. Ask if need more. Leave alone if not more." Without waiting for further instruction, the third icon the Navi had placed depressed, causing PiercingMan's face to disappear and allowing Dharma to see...

... Well, it took a second to adjust to what exactly she was seeing, but it was clear that Connie still had the PET at her hip. The view was clearly from waist height, and she wasn't in it. What Dharma did see were various drinks stocked beneath a bar. She could hear a rowdy bunch of guys at the bar, although, thankfully, it didn't sound like they were banging their fists for a show yet, just talking noisily amongst each other. It did sound like a lot of guys, though. The view in the PET wasn't moving much, although it occasionally shifted just slightly in or out, implying a shift of the wearer's hips.

It wasn't clear if sound was being transmitted two ways. However, if Dharma didn't mind also getting the attention of the viewers, she could always use this opportunity to test out the microphone. The operation of that looked pretty simple.