Lots of Girls Looking For a Good Time

Hello! This is Burt J. Blanchard, founder of the new religion that's sweeping the nations do fast I needn't even explain it! Or name it! But it's Counterinfectualism, in case you haven't been keeping up with the internet.

I have two smoking hot navis, one smoking hot SP, two more SPs who are kind of small butifthatsyourthingIamtotallyokaywithit, and one guy. With a crowd like that, we should be able to do just about anything! My navi, Exorcist, is the perfect navi for whatever task you're looking for, guaranteed!

Please give me a good mission! I want an SP base, alright?

Burt J. Blanchard
I am the Operator of one of the two Navis mentioned by Blanchard. My name is Na'im bin Asad and will be joining in this mission. We have, however, no interest in an SP base so just a monetary reward would be appreciated.

Mister Blanchard,

we've received correspondence from what we are assured is a previous contact of yours within your affiliated organization. In the future, please encourage your contact to either make requests through your faction-specific BBS, or to contact you directly.


Note: In an ongoing effort to make sure all correspondence is tolerable to our guidelines of neutrality, we have censored profanity in the following message.

Quote (Enclosed Message)

Hey there bucko, remember me? I'm sure you do! Me and those girls of yours sure had a good time last time, right? Ha ha ha ha ha! Either way, guess what. I got one of those stupid, boring-[censored] assignments that are suuuuch a pain in the neck, and for backup, do you know who they gave me?

A [censored] Heelnavi! And it was a guy, too! A [censored] guy!

I mean sure, I'm not a ranker anymore, I quit that [censored] job, but man, giving me just a [censored] Heelnavi as backup? That's [censored] retarded. So I sent him home, heh heh heh, and then I asked the punks at the GNA to hook me up with a line to you. They're-- what was it, contractually obligated? Somethin' like that, anyway, they have to at least try to get this to you, so I figure what the hell, you get it or you don't.

Come give me a hand with this, and I'm sure the big bad bosses will reward you. Hah!


Some coordinates were also attached. If you should accept the mission, we will provide them to you.

...It is also worth noting that we have, in fact, contacted your organization about the promised "rewards"; they will be willing to compensate both you and your partner upon successful completion, though they made a strange mention of it not mattering if you do so to your contact's detriment.

The choice, however, remains yours.
This guy's getting a lot more luck than he deserves! I haven't forgiven him for getting so fresh with my girls last time... but I'm a saint, aren't I? He deserves another chance! Fine, I'll help him out. Send me those coordinates!

Also, Na'im, I'll explain the faction affiliation thing in a moment...

-Burt J. Blanchard
Mission acceptance logged. Coordinates attached.

[The coordinates point to somewhere in Electown's industrial district...]

(Topic opening soon)