MeleeMan Grabs a Cup of Joe

"Bah! Can't stand this place," MeleeMan grumbled as he walked into the net cafe, wishing he'd had some doors to blast open rudely with his strong arms. "I feel like I'm extra tense around all these guys. Why does it seem like Netopia's so pretty and conserved? It's not as bad as Sharo, but dammit, a man could lose his rugged manliness in a place like this."

"Netopia is a country renowned for its advanced technology, culture, and rich history of achievements. There's nothing embarrassing about meeting a girl in a place like this," Rania replied, thinking to herself that she rather liked the look of the area. "Anyways, look for a girl with glasses and a black skin suit. I think that was the description."

"Yeah, yeah. I wonder if she'll be hot. Like, something like you, or more like your friend, whatsherface," MeleeMan grumbled. "Or maybe she'll be smoking hot like those two girls back in my battle with the netpolice. Hell, that shouldn't be the limit. I wanna meet somebody stacked," MeleeMan told his operator unabashedly, not even breaking his serious frown.

Rania smacked her PET against the desk jarringly, then clutched it tightly between her gloved hands. "You can't speak that openly! Try to be more decent and polite."

MeleeMan shook his head, continuing to frown in an intense way. "There's nothing wrong with speaking my honest emotions, is there? I just happen to prefer larger breasts, that's all. Men should be tough; women should be soft. That's just the way it works." Finishing his chauvinistic explanation, the navi leaned against a wall to scope out the cafe's patrons and try to find the one he'd been asked to escort.

It didn't take Meleeman too long to find his charge. Within minutes of leaning against the wall, a navi in a black, leathery bodysuit emerged from a large crowd of other navis. Though likely not what Meleeman was hoping for, she was far from flat chested, and sported an otherwise excellent figure. Apart from her bodysuit, she wore a silver circlet with a red jewel set in the center over slick brown hair, and the glasses that marked her as the one Meleeman had been assigned to escort.

The navi glanced in Meleeman's direction, then turned away, thinking him to be just another cafe-goer.

"Score" MeleeMan said under his breath, a wide, satisfied smile briefly spreading across his face. "Why can't you try to have a rack like that, Rania?"

"I can't just magically change the size of my breasts!" his operator defended sensitively, gripping down hard on the desk. "It doesn't work that way!" Brushing her hair out of her eyes, she restored her focus on the mission. "At any rate, that's the navi you're looking for. Go ahead and talk to her, and please, try to be polite and stay focused on the mission, okay?"

MeleeMan nodded absently, walking over to the woman in question. "It's my first time ever casually meeting a navi like this... ever, really. I wonder how it goes? I guess I just act like myself," he thought, unaware that like himself was probably exactly how he should try not to act. Rudely, he pulled up a chair without first addressing her, then leaned back in his chair and put his giant boots onto the table. As if he hadn't done enough, the boots let out a thick burst of smoke that expanded across the radius of the table. "Yo," he addressed the woman finally.

Rania was dumbfounded. "What part of this is supposed to make him the perfect man that all women are immediately attracted to?" she asked herself slapping the PET against her head, unable to even make herself give him further instructions.

The woman gave the navi that had rudely pulled up a chair a strange look, obviously wondering who the hell he thought he was.

"Sorry, did you need something?" the navi asked. Despite having a somewhat cutesy-sounding voice, there was a not-so-subtle mocking tone behind it.

"Me need something? I hear you need something, babe: Me," he said egotistically, switching his position so that he leaned in on both elbows. "The folks down at the police headquarters tell me that you need a bodyguard, and I'm just about the manliest guy in the whole damn net. I'll protect you and take you wherever you need to go."

Rania was curious as to what the new navi's true personality was. She actually somehow seemed to be falling surprisingly well into the archetypes of MeleeMan's ideal woman, but there seemed to be something hidden there... Something far too intelligent to be anywhere on MeleeMan's level. "At least she didn't walk away," Rania reminded herself, twirling her finger in the air in as a lame victory signal.

"And they sent you?"

Mieli sighed, wondering why the netpolice had decided on their usual routine of throwing requests at the first person to ask for a mission. "Well, I suppose I can't have everything."

She pushed herself to her feet. "Anyway, you shouldn't worry about protecting me too much, I needed an ally moreso than an escort." Bowing her head and smiling, she gestured out of the cafe. "Shall we get going?"

"Huh? You? Fight?" MeleeMan grumbled, raising one eyebrow beneath his thick, silver visor. "Shine and Kunie were one thing, but you? You're wearing glasses! Aren't you afraid they'll get smashed or something?" He left out mentioning once again that she was a woman, thinking that it was getting somewhat redundant within his own mind.

"Lots of people, fighters even, wear glasses. It's a little odd for a navi to be wearing them, I guess, but it might be part of her design concept. Or maybe she just thinks their fashionable? I have a friend who wears glasses sort of like those, but a little larger," Rania mentioned.

MeleeMan shrugged, turning back to her. "Well, if you can fight, then I've got your back," he said, giving another brief grin. "If you needed protection, that's one thing, but if you're planning a fight, don't be a burden to me. I want your 100%."

Rania frowned, shaking her head. "That's the sort of thing she ought to be telling you. The employee doesn't tell their employer what they ought to be doing!"

Again he shrugged, then got up. He ended up kicking off in such a way that the table clamored forward and spun about on its horizontal axis for a moment. Frowning and looking back and forth, he sloppily picked the table up and set it right, then headed out the cafe with the female navi.

"Well, I'm so sorry do disappoint you," Mieli responded, laughing. "Did you want me to be frail and defenseless and dress like a princess? My apologies, I'll go right out and buy the outfit."

Nonetheless, she headed out as well, beckoning for Meleeman to follow and giggling all the while.

((Make a new topic in Netopia Net proper to continue this.))