Bayonet's Office

As much as she wasn't aware of the man's lingering gaze in the moments when she had bent over the desk, Pirouette did find herself uncomfortably aware of his proximity and naked arousal, however carefully hidden, when he moved across to lean on the desk alongside her. She fought to keep her features calm. This was good; as awkward as it was, she was getting somewhere with this man, and that was worthwhile. For now, she had to take his momentum and make sure it continued in an acceptable direction, though to her mind, it didn't sound like he needed much guiding at all. she mostly agreed with the majority of his sentiment, after all. She nodded along, then, after a few moments and after he had finished his own vigorous speaking, she stood straight again, springing back to the balls of her feet and turning to face the man directly, palms and fingertips together in front of her.

"This is good. I am glad to hear your resolve, and it heartens me, sir." As it was, she was what some might consider dangerously close to the man, given their current state of dress, but she felt confident he wasn't going to do anything inappropriate towards her, at this point, and frankly, as long as she was in a performance frame of mind, she couldn't exactly resent him looking anyway; she had chosen to present this costume, after all. A stray thought considered that she was fortunate that she herself found nothing arousing in the situation, as GangsaMan appeared to, otherwise it might make changing back into her leotard later a bit more awkward.

"For now, remember that reforms like this, they cannot happen over night, no? I am seeking to gain entrance to the force; I am new, and while I wish to do good work, I will not be able to fix everything right away. It will take some time, you know, but I promise you, I will remain dedicated to this." She thought for a moment, then nodded. "Aie... and remember, sir, what I wish to do here is not an insurrection. It is a reform. It will be orderly and fair, and it will be without bias or favourites. This is my goal. I do not wish to crate more divide amongst the force than there already is. Reform, mend and heal. Bring officers back to the way they ought to behave where possible, and allow them the right to reform themselves, yes? Some, I am sure, may be beyond this, and they may need to surrender their badges, yes, but it will be a process. You understand, yes?"

She had stepped forward and begun to pace back and forth slowly in front of the desk, giving regular views of most of her body in the process; Pirouette herself was mostly involved in thought on the issue and not really paying attention to what she was showing off at any given time now.

"For you, sir, leading by good example must be the first step. I understand the urges, you know... they are strong." She paused, turning away from him to look at the models again, and presenting just the refined line of her back and rear. "But... part of this means being proper and exemplary even when other officers are less than perfect in your presence. Make the reports, certainly, remind them of their duty, diplomatically if you can, yes? And always keep a mind to the protection, respect and safety of civilians first.... but on your own, you cannot be the baton of discipline or punishment to other officers. This only leads to more disruption. Fairness and respect for others; being the officer that every police representative should be, and letting the people see that you are, even when it is difficult, yes? Now... for the rest..."

She turned back, walking around GangsaMan once then moved back to sit cross-legged on the desk again, studying her charge. She was more aware of the indelicacy of her pose and what it showed, this time, but steadfastly ignored it in favour of opening her notebook to a blank page and beginning to sketch.

"If you would please, sir, stand back a bit and let me see you clearly. You can put the towel down if you wish to, or keep it if you would prefer, I only need to get some estimates, yes?" She began thinking, but as always the classics came to the rescue. Here was a man who had lost his identity and was seeking the discovery of a new one, and of fining out who he really was, and what he was really like... but one thing he was certain of was his dedication to the net police, and a steadfastness in doing what was right.

"So, on the matter of respect for civilians, we must still cloth ourselves decently, so as not to upset or to make people uncomfortable, you know. However, you are in the process of rediscovering yourself and who you really wish to be, no? I would not ask you to wear your old clothes, since they are a part of the identity you have rejected. Instead, something simple. Something without features unless you wish to add them yourself. What she sketched up in short order was a simple black, high-necked undershirt with a black closing trench coat that went down to the ground, with fanned lapels. Black suit pants accompanied the sketch, and sensible policeman's boots. the only other feature of detail and definition was a simple, small yet visible net police badge, designed to pin to either lapel. She held the sketch page out to him.

"Simple, and without making any claim about the sort of person that you are or wish to be, but still shows that, if nothing else, you are here to represent what the net police should be, and should always have been. Perhaps if you wear something of this nature, while you are finding yourself more fully, yes?" For now, it sounded like she'd made as much impact on GangsaMan, or whoever he ultimately chose to be, as she was able to. One last thought occurred to her before she asked him to return to his duty for now.

"While I begin getting settled here, and finish the tasks I have been set, It would be best, I think, if you returned to the duties you have been set, for now. Before you go, though, ah, you mentioned reading, well... As I said, I read much when I was asking my own questions. There are no books that I know of, but there are several communities online that exist for discussion and help... support, you know? For navi who find themselves in this position. I am writing down a few links of discussion boards that I frequented during my own soul searching. Perhaps they will also help you." She copied the links onto the bottom of the sketch page and tore it form her notebook for him to take. It took a moment for her to retrieve them, since she'd not visited any of the boards in question in years, but she remembered that simply having other navis to talk to who were also in the process of self discovery had been a great help to her, and she hoped that it would provide GangsaMan some of the support that he didn't seem to have.

"Of course, not overnight. But soon... We must work hard to ensure that change comes swiftly. I can't spin my wheels in labor for no good or purpose any longer, Pirouette. I simply can't," GangsaMan sighed, looking momentarily frustrated. "Not division for the sake of division, of course. We can't be too lenient either, though. While some of the corruption within the NP has been intentional, just as much is laziness and ineptitude. We can't let people get away with doing less than what is necessary of an officer," he further insisted, perhaps not remembering just how close he was to being reprimanded or worse, canned, for his own lack of decorum. "But yes. I understand. It is hard to follow the model of a policeman with its skewed priorities and sometimes pointless behaviors, but I'll do the best that I can if it will help make our shared vision a reality."

Her next words made him open his eyes wider for a moment, then he nodded, sternly, and let his towel fall. He'd only just remembered to replace it, of course, so it wasn't anything she hadn't seen before, but it was clear that either her behavior, her nakedness, his own nakedness, or something was exciting him so much that modesty was barely an option for him any more. It had already required a great deal of her discipline not to ask him about it and would require even more to avoid staring at the elephant in the room. "Yes... I can wear it. It's only right that I should have a new uniform for a new purpose. It's appropriate for my transition," he agreed, accepting the plans, as well as her additional offer of support communities for questioning navis such as himself. "Much appreciated, comrade. I look forward to the impact we'll make together."

Thus finished, he rewrapped the towel around his waist. "I'll have the new outfit programmed immediately, of course, but I can rent a swimsuit to finish today's activities. Once again, thank you for everything you've done. You don't know what it means to me... Oh, and... Ahem," he coughed, furrowing his brow hard and crossing his arms, as if thinking hard on what to say next. "I am also going to break up with my girlfriend. It's clear to me now she's had certain... undue influences on me that are not becoming of an officer. Yes. I'll break it off," he insisted, disappearing with a beam and wood-chiming noise before she had a chance to question him further about that. She could always call him back if she was interested, but the process had been so exhausting so far, she might want a chance to rest, report in to Bayonet, or try to tackle one more officer.
She tried, very hard, not to let her eyes fix on the man's... masculinity... it would have been fine if it was... normal, and relaxed, but cracks appeared in her stage calm and a faint blush of pink had begun to creep across her cheeks while she sketched; Pirouette had never, in truth, seen a male in that... state... before... and it took much of her discipline to hang onto her poise. for her, it wasn't exciting, beyond the sense of seeing something she hadn't before; certainly it wasn't 'exciting' for her in any other way, and thoughts of that nature didn't even really cross her mind directly... but it was improper, and there was an edge of worry that she knew wasn't really justified underneath it because, acting role or not, she was still naked, in a room with a naked man, who was pointing an obvious erection in her direction. Calm. Focus.

Quickly enough, she got through what she was trying to do, and managed to keep a straight face to the end, but when GangsaMan departed at last, Pirouette leaned on the desk and slumped a bit, taking long breaths and pressing the backs of her hands to enflamed cheeks while she waited for her heart to quiet down. Well. That had been... an experience. She swallowed and shook out her wings with a rustle. It was progress though, and if her words stuck, the man might make a valuable and worthwhile ally in her efforts. Hopefully he would more properly behave like a police officer ought to, now, besides clothing himself. Pirouette fanned at her face and took a few paces around the office. She returned to the desk and picked up the next file, but paused and instead sent another quick message to Bayonet, as much to give her some extra time to calm down as anything else.

Quote ("From: Pirouette")

"Bayonet,
I have interviewed and advised three of the individuals now, and believe I have made important headway with two of them. The third I would prefer to discus with you in person, later. Before that, however, if there is time, I wish to quickly conclude interviews with the remaining two, whom I do not believe will take as long."


The remaining two files were, she felt, less problematic. HoundMan's, she picked up first and flipped through it again to refresh herself on the details. As before, she stood in front of the desk while she read the file, then absently reached back behind her to push the button. As she pressed it, her heart lurched and her body gave a startled jerk as she realised what she'd done, and with a quick, desperate motion, lifted a hand over her form, causing the whirling ring of white feathers to slide up and over her body, restoring her clothes. If she was lucky, HoundMan would be a few moments before showing up, if he was particularly immediate, however, it might be a close call.

Pirouette took a little time to cool down after the somewhat scandalous previous interview, before sending a message off to the owner of the office, who might very well want to know how many naked people had touched or sat on her desk since this started, if Pirouette felt like divulging that information later. The response came quickly enough:

Quote (Bayonet)

That's great news, Pirouette. I'll keep my expectations high, then. As for my work, it's nearly finished, so please do make those last two quick. If you don't finish soon and need me to remain outside the office, please message me again, and I can give you a little more time.

Thank you again for the help and I look forward to learning all about your progress.

Piroutte next made the ill-advised, unconscious decision to signal to HoundMan that he was not only clear to enter the office, but ought to do so ASAP. Like a dog responding to Pavlov's bell, the navi appeared with a cutesy "bark-bark" noise, sounding like a real dog rather than his own strange voice. It might have been better consolation to her if a dog did appear, but instead, the navi appeared, still dripping wet and dressed in his showy, tight, elastic swimwear. He probably needed the same lesson in modesty that GangsaMan had received a moment ago. "HoundMan, reporting for duty, Officer Bayonet, Ma'am! Aroo?" he asked, leaning forward a bit as he noticed Pirouette there instead. "I thought I saw a..."

He paused for a bit, closing his mouth tight and twitching his nose. His eyes narrowed. "A butt..."

He shook his head and laughed good-naturedly. "That can't be right! Arf ha ha ha!" he chuckled. "I see you're just wearing white ballerina pajamas! Sorry, no disrespect intended, er... civilian? You're not Bayonet," he remarked dumbly, growing more visibly confused. Worse, Pirouette's previous experience had probably trained her to look out for certain things in her interviewees, but whether she was looking for it or not, the swim trunks made clear that the sight of a naked butt, or even a butt that looked like it might be naked for a moment but was in fact tastefully clad in a somewhat surprisingly tight white leotard, had excited him a little. Thankfully, it didn't seem like he was as bizarrely aroused as GangsaMan had been yet, but he'd probably get there if she stripped down again.

"Well, civilian! What can I do for you?" HoundMan continued, crossing his arms and looking around the office. That token curiosity didn't seem to nearly fit what his reaction ought to be at being summoned into his superior's office, empty save a civilian with no previous NetPolice ties.
There were a few flustered, panicked moments as Pirouette turned around to face the rather expediently arriving HoundMan and double check that her clothes were, in fact, in place. A moment of absent-minded thought, and her lack of considering that the navi in question would almost certainly be prompt to the second when summoned had almost left her in a very embarrassing position but as she took a breath and struggled to mentally cool her cheeks, the officer's response sounded like it would help her move on without incident. She cleared her throat and ruffled her wings, settling herself and regaining her poise.

"HoundMan. Thank you for responding promptly. That shows good discipline, and is commendable in an officer." In her mind she went over her thoughts for him. There was nothing to punish here; lack of good sense wasn't his fault or something that he was doing wrong, it was just something that needed fixed. Reinforce the good behaviours, and guide the problematic ones. She let her eyes move up and down his body briefly, then kept them fixed more firmly above the waist line. Once again, not his fault, she supposed.

"My name is Pirouette, and I am here today on behalf of Officer Bayonet to interview you and make some recommendations to her, and also to you, regarding your conduct. You understand, yes?" Concerning was the fact that he'd assumed she was a random civilian, and rather than informing her that she oughtn't be here, he'd just asked how he could help. Perhaps she had to handle this as though she was working with the children's classes, with Mikhail. she stood a little straighter and settled her hands at her hips, in a more teacherly pose — well, teacherly for ballet students perhaps, but the poise and the presence were what mattered.

"So, what I wish to speak to you about today is the matter of respect for others. As an officer of the NetPolice, it is a part of your duty to see that civilians are accorded the proper respect due to any person, and also that their rights are not infringed. You understand this, I believe. Where you struggle, HoundMan is in understanding the limits that we all must place on ourselves so that we may perform the tasks that matter most as effectively as we can." She paused, taking a longer breath and thinking. She had calmed herself now at least, and had no intention of exposing herself to the easily triggered physiological responses of this particular officer.

"At times, officers must exercise their own judgement in a task. Perhaps one has been ordered to patrol a certain route, and be aware for criminal activity. We could drive the route once, never looking anywhere but ahead, and then claim that we were completed; and yet, this would not be proper, as it would not have been a fair patrol, or thorough enough, you know. The same person might move the route slowly, carefully searching inside every nook and cranny, under every vehicle, inside every bin, inside every sewer grate, on top of every building, and so on, and they may take many hours to complete a route that should only take a fraction of that time. Now they have been thorough, but they have not been timely, and they may also have unwittingly invaded the spaces and privacies of other civilians, and intruded upon their rights. The judgement that an officer must face is to think upon the task you have been given carefully, and determine hat an appropriate amount of time and effort is that should be devoted to it. Too much and you step outside what is proper, too little and you are not doing your job. It is a judgement that you must think on carefully, and learn how to make. I suspect that Officer Bayonet would be able to recommend to you a few other officers who would be able to help you learn how to better make this judgement for yourself, and I will speak with her about it, but I would like you to think carefully about this as well, you know... whenever you are given orders, consider how to carry them out, but consider the limits of the task, and where you must focus, for we cannot ever be everywhere at once, nor do everything at once." As she spoke the lesson, Pirouette paused every few seconds, or every other sentence or so, just to give HoundMan time to process everything she was saying. She didn't want to assume that he was stupid, because that would be uncharitable, but when his judgement struggled as she'd seen, she didn't want to assume he understood automatically either. After pausing for a few extra seconds, she took a longer, more visible breath and marked out a shift in the conversation.

"Now, the other note that I have, HoundMan, was that there have been some issues with you regarding indecent exposure. Let me ask first then, do you understand what indecent exposure is, and what constitutes it, and also, why officers of the net Police should avoid it, both in themselves, and in preventing or stopping it from others?" It wasn't really something that she should have to ask, she thought, but in this particular case she wanted to see exactly what she was working with before she tried to correct anything.

HoundMan closed his mouth up and gave a sharp salute in response to the praise. "Yes, ma'am! I'm always quick on the scene, aroo!" he agreed, then remained quiet throughout her introduction, tilting his head slightly as though just realizing he really didn't know why Pirouette was here. "Oh, I get it! I'm getting promoted for being a fast responder, huh?" he asked, allowing himself a grin; if he had a tail, it'd be wagging, but he didn't so long as he was out of armor. His inference was wrong, of course, so it fell to Pirouette to explain the real reason he'd been summoned.

The officer's eyebrows were already knit in a vexed expression just a few sentences into the explanation. "I've been told I'm a little hasty, Pirouette, Ma'am," he answered, thinking hard. "But also that I'm a little slow! Respectfully, ma'am, I don't understand how I can be both! I don't understand it at all! But an officer needs to be speedy, I know that much. So I try to finish all my work as quick as I can and get new work! That's the way I serve the best I can. Only, sometimes, I do it wrong, like when I stuffed all of those viruses into the can on the beach," he admitted. If he had a tail now, it would be drooping. "My motto is never to hesitate! But sometimes... I should hesitate? Is that what you're saying?" he repeated, his green eyes seldom blinking as they stayed watchfully rooted upon her.

He'd gotten back to a relaxed state over the course of those questions, but he showed a remarkable propensity for stiffening quickly once the subject of indecent exposure came up. "Like a butt? You're talking about that, right?!" he asked, seeming excited about the topic. He seemed to study something in her face that told him his reaction was wrong, so he shut up his mouth again and frowned. "I'm always dressed, so I don't really get what that's all about. Do you mean this?" he asked, grabbing the elastic of his swimsuit and stretching it out for a moment in a way that was both unintentionally erotic and unnecessary. "I know it looks like it's underwear, but it's actually a swimsuit! I wear a swimsuit like this because I like to be fast in the water! It's not to expose myself," the officer insisted. "Of course, if someone else is exposing themselves, I'll be the first one to cover it up! I know good and well that it's no good for an officer to expose himself, but besides that, it's an actionable crime! Yeah, even if I looked for a while, I wouldn't let them keep doing it! It takes me some time, some times, but as long as I know the rules I'll make sure nobody gets away with breaking 'em!"

Seeming happy with his answer, he clenched his hands into fists at his side and smiled. "So, what now? Did you have more questions about indecent exposure, aroo? I'll tell you everything I know!" he continued, evidently missing the fact that he might be a culprit in these incidents. He seemed blissfully unaware that his trunks, for whatever reason, had been modeled in such a provocative manner or revealed anything that ought to stay hidden. Suddenly, another thought occurred to him; he got a little distractedly aroused again and fixed his eyes on Pirouette a moment, nearly cross-eyed, before relaxing somewhat and speaking quietly. "There is that thing though that's hard to control. The 'call of nature,' you know?" he asked, speaking somewhat quietly. "Not the one where you pee or defecate, I mean... Well, ahem! Pirouete, ma'am!" he repeated again; the battled expression on his face made it clear he knew this wasn't a sensible discussion to begin, but something in his nature was powerless to stop. "When someone presents their haunches to you, you know? It's hard to stop yourself! What I mean is, there's something in a navi's programming that drives them crazy when they see a butt! Animal nature, ma'am!" It sounded like he was talking about something that was more a personal problem than something attributable to all navis. "Aroo, you might not know about it, cause it's more of a guy thing. But trust me! When I see someone stick out their butt, especially a pretty girl's butt, dang! I go half-feral, or that's what my op says! That's what you're talking about, isn't it? I can't stop people from indecent exposure if I get all weird around butts like that, can I?" he asked, still standing ramrod straight as if he needed to be granted special permission before he could move or gesture.
Pirouette had to admit, she felt a little sorry for the man, as he tried to guess briefly at the reasons for her summons, and then went back to rigid attention as she explained. He seemed well meaning, and maybe a little simple, but with an honestly good heart about everything. His answer to her first line of advice was, distressingly, about what she'd expected to hear. Here was an officer who meant well, but clearly needed some help with the finer points, and yet no-one had been helping him in any real way, other than to tell him off one way or the other. That was no help at all. Unconsciously her expression grew a little more stern as the thoughts went through her mind, before she smoothed her features again.

Despite her best efforts, she had to blink a few extra times as he attempted to talk his way through the second point of order, and it was an effort to keep hold of her composed expression this time. It was a difficult topic to talk about, and, really, one that should need spoken about in a professional situation. And yet, the fact remained that here, in this man's case, it was an issue and it did need to be properly addressed. Especially since it was not, in reality, his fault. What to do? She folded her arms and tapped her fingers on them for a moment, wings rising and falling slowly.

"Well, for the first point, HoundMan, I would say that you need some assistance in refining your judgement of situations. This is all, really. You are a good officer, or you try to be, from what I can see, you know... but your enthusiasm seems often to overrule good judgement on when to act, and when not to; how far or how thoroughly to pursue a matter. This kind of thing, yes? I think you will learn in time how to make these judgements more soundly, but until then, I am going to recommend that you work with a partner, whom officer Bayonet will approve, and who may be a guide to you in learning this." She drew a longer, deeper breath, setting herself and rolling her shoulders gently.

"For the other matter..." her eyes dipped again to the erotically charged swimwear and back to his eyes resolutely. Despite her efforts, a tinge of pink reached her cheeks. He was a very handsome man... She realised how rigidly he was still standing and her brows creased briefly. "Ah... at...ease, HoundMan...? There is no need to stand so uncomfortably for now, no?" She cleared her throat, searching for the right words.

"I understand your hesitation talking of this. I do not hold it against you for bringing it up. Aie... If it is truly a difficulty that you are faced with, one that makes doing your duty difficult at times then it is something that we must, of course, resolve. It is, of course, ah, not your choice to be, ah, affected in such a way, upon seeing these things. I... I understand this, yes?" Her hands had come together, clasped as she picked each phrase carefully. Why was she the one suddenly having this talk with such a man?

"With most navis, you see, they too experience, ah, urges, yes? They find their eyes drawn to things that are appealing, and so on... but most navis, you know, this is a thing they can simply ignore, when they need to, and continue to do their job. It may be hard, at times... but proper behaviour, ah, respect for the comfort of others, and ones own will power, you understand; these should be enough to keep one from being distracted unduly. I believe you can do this as well, however if you cannot, then the matter is more serious." She paused again, pursing her lips. the thought that occurred to her wasn't the most comfortable one, but it was the quickest way to do a test and make an assessment, so that she could get the handsome and barely clad man out of her office. Her cheeks felt warm.

"I wish to do conduct a brief test, HoundMan." She took a long breath and swallowed. "I require you only to answer in a focused and timely fashion, to retain your concentration on the conversation we are having, and not to act in any undue or inappropriate manner. Do you understand? This is a serious test, and it will impact the recommendation that I make to Officer Bayonet." If he could not do this now, when he was being warned and told clearly how important it was, that would tell her all she needed to know. As it would if he could, she reasoned. She turned around to pick up the notebook from her desk and fussed with it for a moment, pulling her quill out of the air.

"First of all, for the record, could you tell me your name, your operator's name, when you joined the net police, how long you have served, and, in your own words, why you chose to do so." Still with her back to him, Pirouette began to write in the pad, listening to his answers, but before he had finished giving his operator's name, she relaxed her footing in order to lean languidly over the desk, propping herself up on her elbows to continue writing on the hard surface. It was exactly the kind of presenting pose that he'd complained of, with her tu-tu turned upright, obscuring part of her back and wings while leaving her bent lower body protected only by her leotard. If he got through the first series of questions without too much hesitation or faltering, and still sounded like he was reasonably on track, she continued.

"Now, could you tell me about some of the other officers you have worked with in the past. A brief name and description, please, followed by the work you have done with them." Pirouette began to sway her hips back and forth slowly while she questioned him, acting for all the world like she was idly scribbling in her notepad on the desk, and supposedly oblivious. She continued to note down his answers until he made it through the second set, presuming he did; if at any point HoundMan made a move towards her that she heard, Pirouette was very much on guard and ready to stand and flip back around, but she wanted to hold out hope that the well-intentioned navi could control himself.

"And now, if you would, could you report to me what issues you feel are problems within the Net Police these days, and any other grievances or failings that you think trouble the organisation." Now she began to flex her feet slowly, rising up to her toes and down again in a slight bouncing motion while she recorded his responses. If he could get to the end of her questions without losing his train of thought and in a manner that still sounded focused and on track, and of course without making any inappropriate moves, that would prove, she felt, that his problem was just a matter of self control that he was well able to master. If he couldn't get this far, or she had to stop the question early to preserve her own dignity, then that would also give her the answer she needed to make a proper recommendation.

"Oh, for sure! I'm always trying to be a good officer! Sometimes I'm not great, since you or Bayonet or somebody else ends up correcting whatever I've tried to do, but I'll keep doing enough good that on average I'm a very good officer," HoundMan agreed, tripping over himself to agree with both the statement that he had a good heart and the one that he needed help. "A partner? Well, that'd be great! I love working with other officers, ma'am." It sounded like he didn't object to being assigned a partner, but it also was questionable if he understood exactly why she was recommended he get one.

Once she told him at ease, he did indeed seem to drop into a more relaxed stance, acting like an animation some designer had just set from "stop" to "play." "Yes ma'am! At ease!" he responded, but his saluting response still sounded pretty not-at-ease. He then remained quiet for a while, his focused green eyes staring intently at Pirouette's face as she spoke, his lips drawn into a persistent, contemplative frown. He did give a brief nod each time she asked "you understand" or "you know," which was pretty often. Even once she posed her theory that he was strong enough to overcome his natural inclination, and even after she explained what it could mean for his career if he wasn't able to control it, he remained very silent, seeming as though he was waiting for something.

Finally, at "do you understand," he returned a verbal response. "Oh? Okay! I'll act like a good officer!" he answered, snapping another salute. It probably would have been more reassuring if he said he would be a good officer rather than act like one, but it was probably just a statement misspoken. He watched curiously as she turned around, listening to her questions and preparing to respond. His eyes inevitably strayed down and stayed there as he attempted to answer. "My name is HoundMan! My operator's name is Dillan... O'Doibhilin!" he responded, hesitating slightly with an audible gulp. Pirouette would have only sound to go off of for now to gauge his behavior, because for her ruse to work, she had to keep looking forward and acting unaware. "I-I joined the NetPolice two years ag-go-go," he managed to stammer out, sounding like he was having a very difficult time keeping his composure. "I serve to protect! S-s-serve and protect! Aroo!" For a moment, there was panting coming from behind her, not the sound of a man, but a fast, pitched, heated noise like a dog would make.

It suddenly stopped, without him seeming to come any closer, thankfully. For the next responses, he seemed much more under control, suspiciously so. "I've worked with all kinds of officers, mostly Public Safety and Prosecutions, but also Internal Affairs and Justice on occasion. Bayonet's kept me closeby lately, you might have already met her. Officer Bayonet is tall, brown hair, blue eyes, large butt- aroo, excuse me. Sorry! Just being thorough," he corrected himself, sounding aware he'd acted inappropriately and briefly breaking his newfound composure. "PatrolMan, a cop in Public Safety. Big guy, large muscles, strong build. PartnerMan, Investigations, a robot who carries his partner on his back. Cabal, Investigations, with stringy black hair, thin figure, don't remember much about her butt. Cuffs, Prosecutions; blond-dyed hair, dark tan, kinda muscular really big but tight-looking butt! Aroo! Sorry, it's hard to concentrate. Garde, with Public Safety, blond curly hair, soft body, and a big, soft butt."

That could really go on forever, so Pirouette would have to find the right time to jump in and keep questioning. HoundMan's answers continued with no hesitation. "Failures in the NetPolice? Well, I guess there's my own behavior. I'm having a hard time staying focused around butts and there's those errors in judgment you were talking about. If I'm the weak link, I'm just gonna have to work that much harder to overcome it, aroo! Other than that, I don't know if there are any bad officers. PatrolMan might be bad... he was being kind of nasty to Bayonet a while back. That was the time she wore that bikini with the flag on it and washed his car!" he spoke, nonsensically. It was a little hard to imagine her acting like that, but his next words didn't help clear things up: "Oh, I saw her wearing that another time too! That time she was acting crazy and we had to tie her to a chair! Boy, that was a weird one. "Anyway, I got kind of off topic, but I don't think NetPolice should be nasty to each other. At least not like PatrolMan is nasty to people. If we're not trying to help, we're not being good NetPolice! Come to think of it, there's another guy, FashionMan, who's kinda like that too. And I hear AlchemyMan is too! They gotta get their acts together, it's no good if your fellow officers don't wanna work with you cause they think you're gonna be nasty. But then, AlchemyMan is actually ranked, so it's apparently not holding him back..."

It seemed that he'd never done anything like approach her, pounce on her, or anything worrisome like that, but it was hard to say his answers had been focused and on-point, either. If she took this time to turn around, she might finally understand the reason his behavior had changed so abruptly: he was standing very still with a hand over each eye and the eyes closed behind them. He must have realized partway through the first series of questions that he wasn't going to make it through the test, then, out of either respect or necessity, he'd covered his eyes. "Are the questions over?" he asked, oblivious. She might need to try again or with some more specifications if she wanted to make sure he was really capable of operating under such distractions. But then, the clock was ticking, and pretty soon she'd probably need to send Bayonet a message to hold off re-entering, if she didn't want to be interrupted. HoundMan's thick-headedness was making it a bit difficult for her to wrap up quickly.
Worry crept over Pirouette as she listened to HoundMan struggle through his first answers. Her wings stiffened slightly and she couldn't keep a certain amount of tension from her body as she prepared herself to respond to anything inappropriate. Unexpectedly, however, it didn't come, and she noted down his answers quickly, for something to do. She suppressed the urge to peek around and see the source of his sudden cool off. As long as he answered the question steadily, that was more than she'd expected of him, and it was a good surprise.

The answers themselves were... a little worrisome in some places. She wasn't pleased that his descriptions of female officers always carried references to their behinds, while the descriptions of the males did not, but there wasn't time for her to nit-pick over every tiny detail right now. She took more careful notes about his comments regarding failures in the organisation; once again, PatrolMan's name came up, and once more in conjunction with FashionMan, whom Bayonet had also mentioned as a difficulty. HoundMan continued to sound composed, despite her taunting. She took careful note of his exact words in a few places, as further good character reference. In her mind there was, quite literally, no potential that any of his statements were dishonest or not heartfelt. The man didn't seem capable of it.

She stood up from her dramatically suggestive pose, and turned to discover the trick that HoundMan had employed to make it through the line of questions. At first she frowned, but then reflected on it for another moment, and nodded to herself.

"We are done for now, HoundMan. I am pleased that you managed to find some way to control your problem while answering my questions. You are aware of it, and can take measures to deal with it while still performing your duties. This is a good first step. You may return to your assigned duties, and I will make my report and recommendation to Bayonet in due time. Perhaps we will meet again at some point, no?" She nodded her head to him once, then waited for him to exit. On the whole, a good officer, she had decided. Even if his method was not perfect, he had at least recognised his difficulty, and done something to counter the issue, allowing him to answer her as instructed. Idly, she wondered what sort of a man he was when he was off duty. He seemed... honest, helpful, well-meaning, eager, yet polite, as much as he could be... also well balanced, healthy proportions, fairly strong-looking, quite handsome... Idly she caught herself running the feathered end of her quill over her lips for several seconds, then shook herself off and shooed away the brief blush that raced across her cheeks.

Collecting her thoughts, she lifted the file for Cabal, finally, scanned over it once more and then pushed the button. This one would be quick and easy, she was sure. She sat behind the desk, file in front of her and with her notebook and quill in her hands.



"Aroo? They seemed to be pretty simple questions to me! Ha ha ha," HoundMan laughed with simple satisfaction, perhaps still not knowing that she'd been deliberately testing him in any way. "Well, I'll head back to the beach then. I've got a lot to think about now! I'll think about how I can be a better officer... like not getting too focused on butts and not grabbing viruses out of the ocean and throwing them into the trash," he suggested. It sounded as though he might have learned a thing or too, but also like he might not have drilled down to root cause on many of the issues. "I hope we will see each other again! You're awfully nice, Ma'am."

The officer gave a happy salute, then switched nets again with a beam and a noisy woofing noise. It was unlikely that the others were thinking of her as "awfully nice," but thus far, she was different things to different people.

The only navi left to summon was Cabal. Despite that fact, the navi who appeared next was not just Cabal; two beams hit almost simultaneously, with the first summoning Cabal, still in her highly unfashionable full-body swimwear, but now wearing a cloak over it that was liberally scribbled over with all kinds of writing in dried ink. The second was a Bayonet, still in her usual uniform. Cabal looked between the two of them with a disturbing smile twisted across her dark lips. "Oh my... What have I stumbled into?" she asked; the statement was not fully rhetorical, despite her delivery.

"Officer Cabal," Bayonet spoke with a nod, closing her eyes briefly and crossing her arms. "Pirouette, it appears I've interrupted your interviews. If you'd like me back out of the way while you work, say the word and I'll vacate the office again," she suggested.

"Interviews? I was wondering why my coworkers were flickering off and on of the beach that way, and one of them with clothes this time! It was a rare miracle to see him dressed," Cabal spoke with a laugh in her voice. "Hm hm hm hm... Come to see how she managed to do it?" the witch-like navi whispered to Bayonet.

The officer smiled, though her eyebrow twitched with agitation. "That sort of attitude is why you're here, Cabal. Pirouette, I believe I'm going to sit in after all, at Cabal's suggestion. Assuming you have time for one more session, that is. If not, I understand completely; you've done a full shift's work already, certainly," Bayonet commended the potential NP recruit... although, if one was looking for it, it sounded as though Bayonet was a little miffed and wouldn't mind having a chance to reprimand Cabal personally.

"Now, now... We've talked at length many times before, Bayonet," Cabal pointed out, rubbing her thin hands together excitedly. "I want to learn more about Pirouette... Oh, sorry. I've got that backwards, don't I? She's supposed to be learning about me and why I'm the way I am: a strange and insubordinate person."
HoundMan's final goodbyes weren't... entirely unexpected, Pirouette had to admit to herself. It was a work in progress, but progress there was, at least. Her thoughts lingered for an extra moment before the appearance of two beam-ins made her suppress the urge to wince. Too long. Oh well; turn with the passes, after all.

As she'd feared, the other beam was Bayonet, back from her meeting, and Pirouette turned her gaze first to the officer to whom she owed her work, disregarding Cabal completely and ignoring her question. The other woman didn't even have the pleasure of catching Pirouette's eye, yet, and her comments, though unacknowledged, made the ballerina briefly glad that she'd made the choice she had. Instead she inclined her head politely to Bayonet.

"Not at all, Officer Bayonet. I fear I was not as swift in resolving these issues as I had hoped, you know, but please sit in while I assess this final matter. It will not take long, I assure you. Officer Cabal's case is not as tricky as some of the others." Stepping briefly to one side, she gestured for Bayonet to take one of the available chairs, and indicated with a small motion of her hand that the superior officer should take her leisure to one side of the room where she could watch without interrupting. It was only once this was done that Pirouette deigned to look in Cabal's direction.

"On, the contrary, miss Cabal," She left off the woman's rank as she turned to her, snapping her notebook shut with both hands. "I learned all I needed to from you in my initial pass along the beach. I have no need of asking you questions today." She set the book down, carefully on the desk in front of her, then slid it to one side; with each interviewee, she'd used the notebook as a prop for expressing pauses in conversation and for altering the tone and atmosphere of her work, as much as for actual note-taking, and now she rested the quill on top of the side-lined book as well, with a heavy indication that anything worth serious attention on her part was passed. "No. Today, I have simply called you here to make some observations to you, offer you some advice on how to better conduct your job, and leave you with some comments to think upon, in your own time, yes? So, I will be brief." She folded her hands in front of herself and resettled her wings, keeping her expression calm and smooth; at any point she was expecting Cabal to offer commentary of her own, but unless it was a response to something that Pirouette herself specifically asked — and she had no intention of asking anything that wasn't immediately rhetorical — she made no signs of acknowledging it.

"Officer Cabal, you are an intelligent and shrewd woman, I can see this, and as well as a keen mind, you attempt to perform your duty to the net police, and to the general public through them, to the best of your abilities." She paused briefly to let the praise settle. "Because you are a sharp and insightful woman, I will not treat you as a child, no? Today, while you were attempting to discharge your duty as an officer of the net police, you found your task hampered and impeded, yes? It was made more difficult for you by civilians; those who attempted to interfere with your actions, those who attempted to distract you from them or engage you else-wise, and also those who vocally detracted from your credibility to any who would listen, you know. Your job was made much harder than it needed to be, and this had a tangible impact on your ability to discharge your duty at all, despite valiant efforts on your own behalf." Again she paused, feigning thoughtfulness for a moment, before continuing; she hadn't asked Cabal to interrupt or respond yet, and paid her no heed if she was trying to; the ballerina waited exactly as long as she meant to, then continued talking in her same even, calm and stage-carrying tone.

"The reason such stumbling blocks were placed before you should, I believe, be as plain to a woman of your intuition as it is to any other; they either did not recognise you as a representative of the net police, or else they did not believe your claims to be so when you spoke out. This responsibility is upon you, Officer Cabal, because as it stands there exists no properly enforced uniform code within the net police, and individuals are left to present themselves as they please. One must say then, that you yourself placed these very stumbling blocks in your own path and impeded your own actions. We must, if we are being fair, hold you personally responsible for this, as we must surely grant you credit and accolade for taking it upon yourself to rectify the issue and present yourself in a way that solves this problem, as I am sure a woman of your insight will surely choose to do soon." She smiled finally and inclined her head politely to Cabal.

"Something to think on, perhaps, yes? Now, if you would excuse me, I wish to have a conversation with Officer Bayonet upon other matters. Please return to your assigned duties for now, and if I have further need to speak with you, I will call again. Thank you for your courtesy, Officer Cabal, you are dismissed." Still smiling, Pirouette waited, unmoving and without any break in her calm, until Cabal departed; even if the other woman had more to say, she simply waited until she was gone. When it was only her and Bayonet in the office, she took along, deep breath, then let it out again slowly, and let the marble-grade calm relax a little. She turned to the other woman, then swiftly stood from the desk and vacated the position, returning to the outside of the desk in case Bayonet wished to resume her own seat.

"I do apologise if you wished to speak to her yourself, Officer Bayonet. Presentation was somewhat important at that point, you know, and while I know that it may not seem as though much headway was made, I am confident that the correct seed has been set to ensure a change in... aie... at least some elements of her conduct here. I can explain my method on this to you, if you wish, but I also have reports to make to you regarding the other four officers I interviewed. One in particular I think you will be very interested in, and I thought it important enough not to discuss it until you were here in the room with me again, you know? Regardless, I believe progress has been achieved, or else the seeds and first steps of it set, for these five. Where would you like me to begin?" Standing in front of the desk, if Bayonet had indeed taken her place, Pirouette stood now with her feet neatly together and her hands clasped in front of her waist. She had picked up her notebook and quill as she stood, and held them in her hands, but most of the notes that she wished to report were in her head anyway.

Bayonet raised one eyebrow, looking to Cabal for a moment before answering Pirouette. "Very well. I will accept your invitation," the Internal Affairs officer agreed, seating herself where Pirouette had indicated and crossing one of the white legs of her navisuit over the other.

By the time Pirouette looked in Cabal's direction, the woman's face was locked in an even more eerie grin; one might think she was a madwoman, if one hadn't read a file that failed to mention a history of any such behavior. She tried very hard to keep her observations to herself, and that she did, in the form of writing them down on the white side of her cloak in black marker, making impossibly small notes in careful hand as Pirouette talked. She allowed herself a few small chuckles and pressed her own pen to her lip, much as Pirouette had been doing with her quill earlier. "Oh, no... You've given me a lot to think about. I'm always thinking about my fellow coworkers, after all... It's the most important part of what I do," she murmured, making an expression that almost looked apologetic. "And never fear. I have a long history of attempting to help folks who'd rather not have it. Should there come a time where you need my help and feel you cannot turn to your fellow officers, especially in regards to collecting information, please, seek me out. I'll be happy to speak to you. Just know that others will look at you differently if you spend too much time with an undesirable hermit like myself..."

Bayonet looked like she wanted to speak up, keeping one eyebrow raised, but kept quiet in deference to Pirouette. She nodded, indicating it was okay for Cabal to go. The spooky woman cackled again, then vanished into her cloak, before the article disappeared along with her. Still keeping quiet, Bayonet nodded to Pirouette, then stood and switched places as had been offered. There was something uncomfortably familiar in the way she was staying entirely silent with her fingers in a steeple at her chin, waiting for Pirouette to finish. "No, this is your mission, after all. It is only right that you interview her," she agreed. "Please, though, do explain your method to me. I'm almost as curious as she was. Start with that, and from there, tell me about the other interviews. If any of the information is so important you think it requires immediate action, please begin there; otherwise, I'd prefer it in sequential order. Barring the one interview I was witness to, of course."
With Cabal out of the office, and Bayonet back at her desk, Pirouette nodded to the request, gathering her thoughts and settling herself. Her wings twitched slightly.

"With this understood, I will come to Cabal and the others in a minute... I must start with the most urgent matter, as time may, potentially be of the essence, you know... or at least if you decide to take any immediate action, it will not be delayed, yes? The matter of PatrolMan." She took a breath and let it out again.

"As you know, I took a pass across the beach where these officers were stationed, presenting myself as a civilian and a tourist. In the course of doing so, I was drawn into an altercation between three of them, during which PatrolMan singled me out and mocked my body, and also..." she paused, closing her eyes and averting her face for a moment, before regaining her composure. "Also, aie... ah, you know... placed his hands upon my chest without permission." She cleared her throat softly and resettled her wings. "I admit, that at this stage, I lost any sympathy I may have had for his case." She extended one hand to gesture to the drawer where Bayonet's dictaphone was kept.

"When I called him to this office, I considered his file, and your own suspicions, and conducted the interview which you will find recorded there. PatrolMan was not aware that I was recording his... confession. Please, if you would play it back now, yes?" Provided she obliged and checked the new recording, the first would be Pirouette's own leading message, introducing herself and her reasons for recording, followed by the back and forth of familiar voices:

"Bayonet! I'm a little busy right now-!" PatrolMan's obnoxious tones began. "The crap are you doing here? What's with that pose, huh? You think you're sexy? You know what's not sexy? After your little stunt, everybody started beating the hell out of my car! I don't know if you're some kind of senior NetPolice I've never heard about till now, but whoever you are, you owe me the cost of repairs!" The accusation was followed by GangsaMan's slightly breathless responses, nad Pirouette had to work at composing her expression as she recalled the state he'd arrived in, and indeed, the form that her later interview had taken.

"You're lucky I... set aside my weaponry... Or else that would have gone a lot different!"
"Yeah, in your dreams, Pantsless Wonder. Anyway, where the heck is Bayonet? She just called me in here. I was gonna tell her how this jerk-off over here upset everybody at the beach by going commando and how a certain little bitch got in my way when I tried to detain him, but whaddya know, you're here too! I'll turn you both in to Bayonet at the same time. Now, where is she?!"

Pirouette's own voice cut over their argument next, and the ballerina averted her eyes slightly; there was something odd about listening to one's own voice played back.

"GangsaMan, if you would please, you are dismissed from this office for the time being. I will call upon you soon. I would appreciate it if you were properly dressed by the time I call you back, so that we may talk, calmly, yes? You may go."
"Yes, I knew the call wasn't for me, but as you can see, I was dragged here. Wearing clothes now is hypocritical to all I believe. We can discuss that further at my appointed time." There was a short delay, presumably while GangsaMan left, before PatrolMan spoke up again

"What, you're going to tell me off but don't have anything to say to Nudey-Boy? What, should I strip down too? You just brought me here to stare? Don't you have anything better to do than to keep screwing with me?"

"My name is Pirouette, and I have borrowed the use of Officer Bayonet's office for my purposes today, you know. Now, perhaps, PatrolMan, you can tell why you believe you are here, and what you have to say for yourself, no?"

"I believe I'm here because Officer Bayonet has a stick up her ass and is still sore from the time I made her shake said ass while she washed my car. It's a nice ass, though, for what that's worth. Not like you. If some girl's going to try and ride me, I'd want it to be someone with a little more to offer than you've got." Here, Pirouette looked away again, this time more for Bayonet's benefit than her own, avoiding the embarrassing implication of the vulgar officer's commentary. The recording continued.

"Setting aside that casting sexual commentary like that is very unbecoming of a member of the NetPolice... On the beach, you laid hands upon my person without my consent. Further, despite my pleading to be released, you proceeded to mock my body, and also to touch me in several severely inappropriate places. What have you to say to this?"

"Skinny, your consent doesn't have a single thing to do with it when you're interrupting an arrest. Since when does an officer need consent from a criminal? And uh, if you're coming at me for giving you a little poke in the boob, how about you flashing the whole beach, huh? Pot, meet kettle, right? Well, we done here? I'm not going to try to book you for obstruction or anything since I guess Bayonet's the one who put you up to this, but you should probably read a book or two while you're here and learn what the extent of your 'rights' are when you mouth off to an officer."

There was a brief pause and Pirouette raised two fingers on one hand to catch Bayonet's eye.

"Ah, I would like to note that while I was embarrassingly exposed to several civilians, it was not with consent nor willing, and it was certainly not as a result of any of my own actions." She frowned at the recording device, as though she could send her disapproval to PatrolMan through it. The dictaphone responded by continuing with her own voice again, at the end of the brief pause.

"Claims that others wearing revealing clothing justifies uninvited sexual contact... continues to pass sexual commentary and make derogatory slurs against women even while being interviewed... propositioned exposing himself indecently to interviewer... continued derogatory language and insults directed at other officers..."

"Hey, I'm not against all women! Just uppity snobs like you, Skinny. You and Jugs have that in common." The snide remark was overridden by Pirouette's voice in a clearer tone.

"No, we are not done, PatrolMan. This interview has only just started. Do you believe that the way you talk to civilians is appropriate and becoming of a NetPolice officer. You believe that you are entitled to treat others in such a demeaning way, no? Why? Why continue to act in such an overtly abusive manner when you are aware it only makes doing your job harder? You spoke, on the beach, about things you have arrested others for, yes? And yet within that, you made clear that, were a civilian to act towards you as you act towards me, you know, that you would certainly arrest them immediately. You believe it is your right to maintain this imbalanced and abusive position?"

"Ha, well, I might as well drop some knowledge on you since you've got so many questions. We can treat this as a lesson for you rather than an interrogation for me. Lesson number one: demand respect!" A blare of sirens filled the recording for a moment. "The truth is, we NetPolice do a hard, thankless job. The people of the net are entitled asswipes who don't have a lick of respect for the work that I do. If you try to be nice and worry about people's feelings or whatever other crap like that, you're just wasting your time; they'll walk all over you. But being a goody-two-shoes is just as bad. There's shades of gray to everything. That's lesson number two! Nothin' pisses people off like a good-two-shows, so being the bad cop is actually the cool thing to do now. Chicks love it.
"So to answer your question: yes, I do think it's okay for me to keep an imbalanced position. It's not about balance, okay? It's about I'm a cop, I put in the work, I deserve to stand above the mooks and society only keeps running alright if I remind people where they stand every now and again. Got all that? What, are you writing all this down to give to Bayonet? Sorry you don't like the way I do things, but that's not gonna accomplish a damn thing. I've got friends in high places!" Here, Pirouette allowed the small edge of a smile creep across her features while she waited for the useful part of the interview to play out.

"Have you considered, PatrolMan, that in all of your over-reaching, you may have finally exhausted the favour of those who would shelter you? Have you considered, perhaps, that I am here today, instead of Bayonet, to whom I do not, in fact, answer, you know, because you have made yourself more of a headache to protect than your continued friendship is worth?"

"What...?" PatrolMan's intal response wasn't that surprising, but it swiftly became more incriminating. "Hey, I've fooled around a little, but all I've ever done is what that bastard told me I could and should, alright? What is this, are you telling me I'm a fall guy?! Cut the bullcrap, this isn't some movie! I'm gonna...!"

"When you arrived, PatrolMan, I gave you my name. I am not required to inform someone of your position anything more about my rank or standing if I do not wish to; my name, I give out of courtesy." Pirouette shrugged lightly at Bayonet here: it wasn't untrue, since, given that she wasn't a formal member of the net police yet, she had no rank or position to give. "You will think very carefully about the position you find yourself in, and you will think carefully about whether you wish to continue using derogatory and sexually insulting terms, or whether, as would be wiser, you will use the name I offered you for the rest of this interview."

"Lesson one. I do not desire nor require your respect to do my job. I simply do it. I do not need to rave or bully or raise my voice. I simply do what I deem necessary, without a fuss. You have attempted to, as you say, walk all over me, at every opportunity since we met, and it has gotten you precisely nowhere, PatrolMan, because I am doing my job, and your opinion on that means nothing to me."

"Lesson two. The NetPolice upholds. They do not stand above. If you behave in a way that you would arrest other people for, then you are not fit to be a member of the NetPolice. If you joined up because you believed it was a good place to grant you the power to bully other people and boss them around, then you should resign. Perhaps go and join the Shogunate instead, no?"

"Lesson three. There is no circumstance, at all, where it is ever appropriate for any member of the NetPolice to initiate uninvited sexual contact with, or pass perverse sexual commentary upon, anyone. It does not matter if it is another officer, a civilian or a criminal which you are apprehending, this is never appropriate under any circumstance." As the recorded voice of Pirouette reprimanded the recorded PatrolMan, Bayonet would be getting a decent slice of perspective on Pirouette's own view towards the duties and responsibilities of the Net Police towards civilians. Not a bad thing, in the Balerina's mind.

"I am not a 'goody-two-shoes' as you put it, PatrolMan. I am just a woman doing her job, quietly, efficiently, and without a fuss. You might stand to learn several things, no? Now... Unless you have any final remarks you wish to add which you think may help your position or mitigate your failures, I am finished with you. You are dismissed to return to your assigned duties." The invitation to protect himself drew out a greater confession, as Pirouette recalled hoping it would, and PatrolMan's answer came clear and angry.

"Dammit...! What the heck are you talking about?! My conduct?! I thought you guys said I wasn't going to have to worry if I did things my way? Just how deep in the crapper are we, huh, that you're telling me to be a good boy while I pick up trash on the beach? There can't be any danger just from stupid stuff like that, can there? Fine. Doesn't matter. You guys say jump, I ask how high, I get it. You just keep doing your part and I'll do mine. I guess I've got no choice but to try to be a little more saintly, huh? I know the way this works. I'm in deep now and there's no walking away. And I don't want to! I'm gonna keep being loyal, you don't have to worry about it, just... you know... damn! I'm not supposed to have to worry about this crap! You guys do your part, alright?!" There was a small exultant thrill that Pirouette felt move through her again, and a feeling of satisfaction at hearing the disgusting man incriminate himself once more.

"Hey, who's snooping around anyway? Besides Bayonet, I mean? Is it the witch? I'll bet it's the witch. If you guys want me to do something about it and get all our asses off the line, just say the word."

"I appreciate your understanding, PatrolMan, and I apologise for speaking... firmly to you. I will, of course, continue to do my part in this matter. Your loyalty is noted, yes? Good day." Her balming response, which promised to do no more than bring corrupt elements to justice, of course, was the last part of the recording before the sound of PatrolMan leaving the office were heard, and Pirouette's quieter voice signed off the recording. Pirouette herself sighed and looked up to Bayonet, still with her hands clasped in front of her.

"It does not give us much that is concrete, you know, about who else is involved, but his careless tongue does confirm your suspicious that something... aie... dirty, is going on here, and that he is deeply involved. I regret that my work will likely not improve his behaviour in any real way, but I deemed that exposing this issue with evidence was the more important task at the time. I truly believe that the Net Police would be a better organisation if that man were no longer associated with it... but he may lead you to others who are involved in whatever dealings are taking place." She pressed her hands together an tilted her head.

"As I mentioned, he was not aware that I was recording him, and he spoke unguardedly, you know. I do not know if this impacts how actionable it may be as evidence, but it at least gives you knowledge of the situation that I hope you may find useful, no?" She nodded to herself. "I brought this up first, in case there was any immediate action you wished to take. I do not know if PatrolMan will make contact with others who are involved as a result of my probing, but I wished to give you every minute, just in case. If you wish to act now, I can remain here and wait to give you the other reports, yes? If it is less urgent, I will continue now with the others, beginning with Officer Garde." She lowered her gaze politely, waiting to see what Bayonet's reaction and response would be.


The ranking officer's face went from concerned to scornful at the non-present officer as Pirouette got started with her recollection of events. "An altercation? He touched you inappropriately? That scum... to think he'd go so far even with a civilian! Nothing's going to protect him this time!" she swore preemptively; Pirouette had some much more concrete reasoning to support that claim, which she'd get to a moment later. "A confession? Now this I've got to hear," she agreed, nodding and giving a quick tap to the button on the recording device, before setting it down in the center of the desk. She formed a steeple with her hands in front of her mouth and listened with a grave expression, leaning her elbows on the desk and watching the recorder.

She raised an eyebrow and looked to Pirouette, stopping the recording for a brief moment shortly after it started. "A sexy pose? I certainly hope you weren't baiting PatrolMan into anything? Note that I only object out of concern for your personal safety... he's an unsavory person, as you know, and I'm surprised he didn't take the chance to pounce upon whatever carrot you dangled in front of him. I'm glad he did not, however..." she interjected, giving Pirouette a moment to respond, before continuing the playback.

Her eyes narrowed as she endured listening to an array of personal insults and sexual harassment from PatrolMan; it begged the question of whether he'd say the same to her face or whether he'd only do so in private. Judging by her opinion of him and his earlier behavior, the former seemed likely. She raised an eyebrow again, this time not pausing the recording, and whispered across to Pirouette. "Flashing the beach? What is he talking about? Is that some other trouble he caused?" she asked, then quieted as Pirouette indicated that an important point was coming up. "What? Not by choice? Not a result of... are you saying he exposed you to the beach?!" she asked, looking shocked. "I can't begin to imagine... I apologize, Pirouette. I never meant to put you at the mercy of the man's insane perversions. To think he'd go that far...!" she simmered, gripping down hard on her desk as Pirouette began the tape again.

She continued watching with a grave scowl, perhaps thinking that while Pirouette had recorded plenty of incriminating slurs from PatrolMan, none of that had been good enough to get him thrown out of the police before. As it turned out, she had one more trump card, which surprised Bayonet almost as much as it had PatrolMan. As PatrolMan went on, her eyebrows raised, though Pirouette still hadn't managed to get a smile out of her. By the end of it, she looked as though she'd been thoroughly surprised. "Such a vivid confession you managed to drag out of him... We've now confirmed he is in collaboration with a shadow organization within the NP and that said organization is large enough that he may not recognize all of its members. This gives me all the reason I need to suspend him and put him in confinement. No one can deny evidence like this," she insisted. "Pirouette... perhaps you should be part of Interrogations instead? They could all stand to learn a thing or two from you about what it takes to get results." She was indeed smiling now, though whether it was at realizing Pirouette's potential or because they finally had something they could use to nail down PatrolMan was hard to say.

She seemed to sober up a moment later and placed her thumb and forefinger to her chin thoughtfully, adopting a pensive expression. "We do face something of a dilemma here. I agree wholeheartedly that such a man has no place walking free, let alone serving on the NetPolice's forces. As such, it's certainly fair to say that we need to lock him up, immediately. On the other hand... to do so, I will need to present this information to my peers. At the very least, Prosecutions and Investigation will end up getting involved... I do not know where the malefactors inside the organization are... though I can certainly guess FashionMan is also associated, given how he is usually involved whenever PatrolMan is let off the hook. You see my point, though: in order to bring him to justice, I have to involve the very same others who may be part of his collective. Since you were instrumental in obtaining this vital information, I think you should have some input: should we prioritize going after PatrolMan and getting him off the force, or would it be better to use him as a lead by which we can sniff out the rest of his benefactors?"

She'd let Pirouette offer her advice, then nodded, continuing on. "Well, I certainly hope that PatrolMan was the most egregious of the offenders today. Please, tell me what you know about the others and the means and methods you used to interrogate them. A 10,000 feet view on these others will be fine," Bayonet requested, seeming to be in a more amiable mood now, perhaps now ingratiated. She'd grabbed up PatrolMan's file and seemed to be fighting hard to resist the urge to open it up and expand her notes given the new information, judging by the way she held it upright, idly, upon the desk.
At the end of her report, Pirouette frowned one last time at the recording device before returning her focus to Bayonet and gauging her reaction to the reports. During the short exchanges during the recording, she took the time to illustrate that PatrolMan's accusation of a sexy pose had been directed at nothing more provocative that her standing by the desk with her arms folded and one leg crossed over the other — certainly not an invitation by any means.... But by the time the tape clicked off and she listened to the other woman's assessment, the ballerina nodded, her own expression thoughtful.

"If you think I would be better suited elsewhere, well, I do suppose you would know this more keenly than I, yes? But, as you heard, you know... It is my goal to reform this institution. To fix what is broken or corrupt, to re-order where necessary, reform where possible, and to return the Net Police as a whole to what it should be, yes? There are many in the public sphere... they think the net police a posmeshishche... aie... the phrase... a laughing stock, you know? I wish to fix this, and it sounded as though Internal Affairs would be the best place to start, ah, but if you would advise otherwise, I listen, of course. Regardless..." She shook her head and ruffled her wings briefly.

"The matter of PatrolMan I feel should be handled swiftly, but also very carefully... It is a good lead, you know, but it will fall apart if the wrong people are alerted. As much as it pains me to say for now, I think the immediate course of action is to simply watch him. Behave no different; as frustrated and helpless to thwart his depravity as ever, without sign that you have any greater hope. Work to mitigate his poor behaviour, knowing that it cannot be trusted, but in secret, have him watched, carefully, by one you know is innocent of the matter." She tapped one finger thoughtfully on the back of her hand, where they were folded at her waist.

"I think soon he will try to contact others he knows who are involved, to get answers, or make complaints, or to confirm his position and situation with them. This is what must be observed. As long as he does not see himself as a secrecy risk, then he can be a useful tool for confirming who else is involved. If others who are involved know that he is compromised, however, the lead, it dries up, yes? This is why I say it should be acted upon quickly. I have given him a scare, and a push, yes? I do not know when he will act, but I think he will not wait long."

"For the rest, each case needed a slightly different touch, but I will be brief. None of them were as terrible as this one. So..." She began, settling her pose again and calling back her notebook to flip it open.

"With Officer Garde, I am not certain how much headway was made, but I did find it necessary to impress upon her the seriousness of her situation. Once she understood that I was serious in my assessment that severance would be preferable to her continued conduct, and she could see that I meant this, instructing her grew simpler. A complete reform may not be necessary in her case; rather, I sought to impress upon her a few basics that will mean she no longer projects an image of laxity and unconcern while representing the Net Police." Pirouette flipped a page and nodded to herself.

"In particular, that there is nothing wrong with her desire to, as she termed it, 'update the parameters of her orders', but that it is imperative that unless it be an emergency, she must first follow the proper channels to do so — clearing such updates with her commander at the time, relenting if she be overruled at that point, and so on. Allowing her to maintain her sense of right action and personal initiative, as long as she obeys these simpler constraints seemed to be the best way to curb the most difficult elements of her behaviour. I regret that I did not have an opportunity to strip her of the foolish sense of rivalry that she places between herself and you... though I do suspect that if time could be made to show her first hand her flagging capabilities as compared to your own, it may indeed impress upon her the importance of proper discipline. Perhaps not, I cannot say; mayhap you have tried this before to no avail." She shrugged here; more discipline would help Garde regardless of whether it was combat-driven or otherwise.

"Moving on..." Pirouette took a longer breath and turned another page. "The officer who has previously been known as GangsaMan." She let the term of reference settle briefly before continuing.

"He has been through much, and as it turns out, has had no support in his time of need. Empathy was what was required here. An understanding ear and a balm to his disillusionment. He is a good officer, and though he has, in this time, cast off all else about himself, he has continued to work with the Net Police. He needs time, and I would advise that if he asks for leave, it must absolutely be granted him. He needs people who will support him and accept who he chooses to become at this juncture.

"I did not seek to reprimand or discipline him. I merely spoke with him about what had happened, and how he felt about himself, and all that surrounds this. He is questioning himself and his purpose; his existence and his reason, you know? Many navigators have been through the same crisis, as I have myself. He has cast off his old name and the narrow purpose with which he was first designed, but has not found who he wishes to be for himself yet. In speaking with him, I have seen hat he chafes at the corruption in the Net Police, for al the same reasons that drove me to apply here, and I believe that as long as he is given the time and space he needs to stand on his feet once more, he will be a valuable ally and a trustworthy one in healing the Net Police and its image. I designed an outfit for him that he has agreed suites his current state, and I expect he shall be wearing it soon." She nodded to herself, then frowned for a moment. "Ah, he also mentioned that, in speaking with one who understood his position, he could now see where several people had been having a terrible influence upon him, you know, and told me that he planned to sever ties with those people. I believe he was sincere in this, and that such will be for the best, yes?" About to turn over she raised a finger for one final point. "Oh! Also, I should say. As he has cast off his name, in his efforts to discover himself, it would be antagonistic to continue to use his original designate, you know. It cannot be enforced, of course, but, I found it most beneficial to simply address him as 'sir', while speaking, and it may be prudent in future to ask if he has decided upon a term by which he wishes to be called, yes?"

"Now... HoundMan..." Pirouette paused, gathering her thoughts, and then sorting the useful thoughts from the distinctly unhelpful ones that bubbled up. "HoundMan... he is doing his best, you know?" She paused again, then continued. "I found, in talking with him, and observing him on the beach, that his is not... stupid. Others, I fear, treat him as such, but that is unfair. His enthusiasm impedes his judgement, but all else for him, is in the right place, and as it should be. I spoke with him briefly, and then I ran a few tests upon him. What I learned is that he is, indeed, aware of his short-comings, and when his attention is drawn to the, he is quite capable of taking measures to correct himself. There are certain areas where he struggles," before she could catch herself, a slight pink crossed the tops of her cheeks. She took a breath and tried to regain her poise. "But he is aware of them, and understands the need to overcome such issues.

"What HoundMan needs most, right now, is a partner while he is on duty. Someone who can reliably be trusted to help him — not to reprimand or scold, not to punish or belittle, but to help show him good judgement from bad, in a friendly and helpful manner, and to guide him until he has learned to make proper judgement calls on his own. This is all he needs, I feel. A partner could also ensure that matters do not go awry at times when he is faced with his... aie... weaknesses, you know." A traitorous thought in her mind considered volunteering to be his patrol partner herself, with the mental image of him in his swim wear trying to crowd forward, and she shoved the thought down.

"Which leaves us only with Cabal." Pirouette shrugged as she chased the faint blush off her cheeks. "Again, a good officer, but with failings. It seemed to me that she is a woman who prides herself on her insight and her intelligence... she is one who believes that she is more cunning than anyone she works with, and who is sharper than her colleagues. The may be true, or it may not be, but I felt as though fighting against that directly would not bear fruit. Instead, I acknowledged her intelligence and cleverness, while projecting an image of being just as insightful and perceptive myself. I sought to intrigue her and pique her interest in me, while giving little away. Then, I planted the seed that someone of her keen mind could nurture, and eventually take accolade for as being her own idea. If Cabal herself ends up leading the push for a respectable level of Net Police identification, then as well as solving her own attire issues, and creating the respectable and identifiable image which the Net Police ought to have, there will also be no chance of her rejecting it, or straying from it.

"I did not, you understand, attempt to enforce any rule upon her, or discipline her into wearing a proper outfit, or showing proper respect for rank. In her case, a rather, I felt it would be more fruitful in the long run simply to plant a seed that can germinate on its own in time, while highlighting the places where not doing these things was only making her own job harder, you know. Her case may not show results right away but in time I believe it will."

With her reports concluded, Pirouette took a longer breath and nodded, then found herself wishing for a glass of water. Hopefully Bayonet would be satisfied with her work, but in Pirouette's own mind, the work she had done had created building blocks for improvement, just on their own. She was satisfied.


"Ha ha. I was merely joking, Pirouette," Bayonet chuckled, leaning her cheek on her fist and giving her eyebrows a sympathetic tilt as if to apologize, given that joking didn't seem to come naturally to either of them. "I wouldn't give up the chance to aid you in that very course correction, to say nothing of the folly that would be giving up such a promising new recruit while I'm so far one of the few officers to have had a window to view her natural abilities." She sat back up to attention as she continued, offering commentary throughout. "Then we are in agreement. If PatrolMan yielded so much with a little deception, then it's only a matter of time until he names names. All we need is the name of someone higher up... if he named FashionMan, I would not be surprised and would not complain," she murmured, making a sour expression. "But don't worry. I'm in no hurry to lock anyone up. You're correct that he needs to be watched carefully and discretely, however... I'll handle the matter as such. I must not assign him new supervision in any official capacity, or word will reach his higher ups. Therefore... I will have someone spy on his activities secretly, that is the only way."

Thus resolved, she listened through the other cases. "The whole 'rivalry' idea Garde entertains is both unwelcome and unhealthy, but I don't seem to be able to break her of it. It would also be unseemly of me to try to demean her either by competition such that she 'learns her place' if that's what you're suggestion, though I understand why you would think it. Regardless... again, though I hate to say it, I believe she's received ample opportunities to see that her swordsmanship needs to be less about flair and more about functionality. Ah well. I believe it's still some valuable insight: that even if she thinks that she can do whatever she likes due to her perceived rivalry with me, her imagination as to what you and your evaluation might represent are more effective at keeping her in line. Please continue to treat her with appropriate heavy-handedness in the future if that's what it takes. We need her to exceed her past performance as a Public Safety officer... if there's one place we don't want to have a weak link, it's in Public Safety, where the citizenry must be protected... publicly."

Bayonet looked slightly vexed as she listened to the description of the officer formerly known as GangsaMan, but held her words until it was over. "I understand; I will do what I can to make sure that his fellow officers, and I as well, treat him as you've described. It sounds like you've made a great deal of headway, although the cherry on top would be if we knew the identity of the one who'd set him astray. Perhaps we'll learn that in time. At any rate, it's significant progress, and I thank you for your work there. It sounds like I owe him a visit whenever he feels up to receiving me," she continued. "I wish he'd spoken to me or anyone about the seriousness of his discontent and the reason for it. I'm a bit cross on that point. If he received counsel outside of the NP rather than seeking within, then I believe there is a lesson for him to learn... But then, perhaps this is my fault again for being unapproachable. Either way, I'd best meet with him."

When it came to HoundMan, it was hard to tell how much of Pirouette's hidden feelings Bayonet was perceiving; there certainly wasn't any sign of the same emotion playing beneath the surface of her own steely expression. For a moment, it looked like she was about to speak up to ask what kind of test Pirouette had conducted to test HoundMan, but blessedly, she seemed to hold her curiosity and keep listening, then either forgot or dismissed it by the time it was her turn to speak. "Well. If that's your frank evaluation, I'll accept it. You may be right... we'll see if a partner can help keep him in check or teach him. It sounds like you may be able to help... perhaps I'll look for a way to assign you together in the future," she spoke, probably not helping whatever fantasies Pirouette might be happening. Her face was relentlessly unaware of however Pirouette might be feeling about him, to the point that Bayonet probably seemed a little dense.

"As for Cabal, it sounds like you've run into the same sort of wall I have. She is perfectly competent... and one of the few NP officers who seems as deeply concerned with this underlying conspiracy as I am. That said, you've seen her failings as well. Unfortunately, while she was smiling and I imagine her curiosity was indeed piqued, she probably left feeling slightly annoyed and a little disappointed at being left out of whatever the true purpose of the beach gathering was. That's a different outcome than I usually reach, but not altogether a more productive one. Still, I'm sure you'll have more opportunities to interact with her in time and perhaps new insights will come to light," she finished, perhaps leaving Pirouette a little disappointed herself.

With that said, Bayonet grabbed the recorder back and placed it back inside her desk. "Now that you've completed many evaluations, it is time for your own. I'll be blunt: you've exceeded every expectation I had for you on this mission. Whether you'd say so or not, in my eyes, you've basically solved two of these cases and offered effective suggestions for moving forward on two of the others. So let's call it two and two halves, or three, total. For that, I will award you the NetPolice membership, along with five-thousand zenny, as well as two battlechips. Let's go with Hi-Cannon and RedFruit1... hopefully they will keep you safe on occasion you do need to fight. Though remember, for those of us in Internal Affairs, command is our responsibility and battle our occasional burden. It is a hard thing, to be organized and efficient, and yet that is most important of all. i know you're up to the task," she reminded Pirouette, as she produced the data packet and handed it across the table. "But never forget the weight of it. You're right: we must retake the public perception and remind them that we are the force that best protects and serves them. We must remember what separates us from the others: that our organization is not about us, like the Mafia, nor about some idealized future empire, like the Shoguns. Our organization is about the people who exist now and will continue to exist, in a realistic sense. How best to serve and protect them. I sense that you understand that and will uphold it well."

The lady finished by standing up, keeping one hand on the desk as she circled around, then extending the other. "Sorry, long-winded. I'm afraid I take after my operator in that respect," she smirked, giving Pirouette a firm handshake. "Is there anything else we should discuss before you set off? I know this has taken plenty of your time already. I'm eager to update each of my case notes, myself."

*Pirouette gains NP membership, 5,000 zenny, Hi-Cannon x1, RedFruit1 x1*
For her part, Pirouette closed and dismissed her notebook, and stood with her hands clasped politely in front of her waist while she waited for Bayonet to render her judgement. She nodded to her and otherwise held her thoughts while the senior officer gave her verdicts. Bayonet wasn't quite as optimistic as Pirouette herself was about some of the cases, but she did suppose that that was the other woman's right of experience when dealing with them.

She had a few more thoughts on a couple of them, but the suggestions could come later; it sounded like Bayonet was satisfied with her efforts and Pirouette was, for the time being, glad to be accepted. Her eyebrows jumped, and a slight pink tint threatened her cheeks again when Bayonet, seemingly oblivious, mused about assigning her as HoundMan's, and she focused on calming herself and shooing away the little skip in her heart. It wouldn't be practical really, considering the work she intended to be doing... and regardless of that it was very unprofessional of her to be allowing such reactions based purely on a pretty face. Well, not just the face; he was very handsome all around, and with a fit, well-proportioned body, and of course he seemed kind and helpful, and it didn't really matter if he was a little... well... less than intellectual, since his heart was obviously in the right place, and... Pirouette forced her attention back to Bayonet, who was still talking, mercifully unaware of the ballerina's wandering thoughts.

She nodded again, accepting the grave responsibility of working for such an organisation with the seriousness that such a dedicate deserved then allowed herself a small, more relaxed smile.

"I will not keep you, then, Officer Bayonet. I will be in touch with you later, at a more suitable moment, to ask about the, ah, you know, minutia of the work. Expected hours, a formal copy of our legal codex, these such things, yes? It can be sorted out through mails later when you are less busy. Ah... if I may... you have heard that I am interested in repairing our public image as much as fixing the issue that have led to it, so... Having a unified identity is an important step there. I should like to design a formal uniform for myself, but, ah, with a mind that certain elements of it should be easily transferable to be visible on all net police members who are in the public eye, you know? It would not need to be anything that interferes with their preferred mode of dress, of course, but, something small yet visible; something that civilians can see at a glance, and know that, however else this person may look, they are police, and they can be trusted, yes? A design of this nature, if I may?" She shrugged softly, then smiled again. "Aie... at any rate, thank you for overseeing my application today, Officer bayonet. I look forward to working with you, and with others of the net police, in the future, no? A good afternoon to you."

With a last quick curtsey, Pirouette stepped back, then signalled to Mikhail that she was finished. A moment later, the tall oval of spinning feathers encircled her, then burst, leaving only a few swan feathers fluttering to the ground, which themselves quickly dissipated.

----
((Pirouette jacking out, returning to -> The Swan Theatre))
Bayonet gave a smile that seemed at first reassuring, then sympathetic, once she realized that Pirouette was probably hoping for an affirmation that paperwork and schedules were on their way. "Pirouette, I don't mean to dissuade your enthusiasm for setting an appropriate schedule, but you should know that officers we employ through the GNA recruitment kiosk do not keep strict hours. As for legal codex, you should find everything you need on the net, but if you do need any additional information, we receive both civilians and officers alike at the Headquarters to address such questions. You can also consult a BBS, a fellow officer, or myself if any of those can help you," she explained. "As for a uniform, you can certainly make your own and submit a suggestion as such, although... the fight to make FashionMan wear anything he doesn't want to is indeed going to be an arduous one," she sighed, crossing her arms again. "Well, back to the point, any questions or suggestions you have can be made at headquarters, if a superior officer isn't handy."

An unkind observer might believe that Bayonet was trying to avoid another deluge of protocol criticisms from Pirouette, as she cleared her throat and spoke again quickly. "Thank you as well, Pirouette. Before I forget: know that faction points are assigned to members for successful missions, such as this one. I'll be giving you full marks. Please, enjoy the rest of your afternoon," she concluded, nodding along with Pirouette but not returning the curtsy, for obvious reasons.

*Pirouette receives 20 Faction Points*

((Pirouette also receives:

25 Bayonet FXP
5 Garde FXP
14 HoundMan FXP
6 Cabal FXP
13 GangsaMan FXP))