EBA:the unvailed past.

this is my first fanfic, this takes place about a year after the game.

15 years ago...

on a cold dark night a silver haired woman in a cloak runs through the streets, carrying a child in her arms twords a house in town, tears flowing down her face.

"My son......please......be safe."

as she got up to the front door, she placed the baby down on the step, she rang the door bell and ran from the front door, the door opens as a couple takes in the child and shuts the door, the woman still running away from the house, only one thought crossed her mind......."I will come back for you......i promise mike.....i will come back for you....."

present day...

the same house where the child was taken in still stands, the same couple still there......all looked peaceful.......untill a scream bursts out from the house.


inside a silver haired boy is being beaten by a man with brown hair while a woman with black hair just stands there with a smile on her face.

"WORTHLESS BRAT! YOU COME HOME WITH BAD GRADES ALL THE TIME!" yelled the man as he kept on hiting the child with his bare fists, blood from the boy's mouth and nose splattered all over the floor.
"But.....but i have all A's on my report card! why do you do this to me!?" the boy managed to say as he fell down to the floor, blood still flowing from his mouth and nose.
"You never even STUDY for your tests you little bastard!" the woman yelled out from the side. "How do we even know you didn't cheat on everything!?"
"Be.....becuase......" the boy said as he got up onto his feet. "Because.....I'M THE SMARTEST PERSON IN THE ENTIRE SCHOOL!" the boy was struck again by the man, his step-father.
"Thats enough dear. stop hiting the boy." the woman said as the man's fist stoped near the boy's face.
"Go to your room you horible child......and now......what are you going to say when people ask about your face?" the man asked the boy.
"I.....i got attacked by some gangsters."
"Good boy.....now.....GO TO YOUR ROOM!" the father said.

then boy did as he was told to, but not before grabing a few paper towels and cleaned himself off.

"I....i don't know why they do this to me......i do EVERYTHING they tell me to.....is nothing i do good enough for them?"

The boy desided to sneak out of the house, he was never caught before and he doubted he would be caught now as his step-parents usualy went to their room after they beat him.

later that day, at the mall.

Mike, that was his name, steped through the automatic doors in front of the mall, he had a little cash on him from a job his step-parents forced on him, he went into a book shop and bought a nice manga, mike didn't have any freinds, he was forced to be alone, no one realy knew him, because his parnets made him study all the time, he knew they wern't his real parents, he overheard them once talking about finding him on their doorstep, calling his mother nasty things, though they did not know her. mike had a feeling that today was his lucky day somehow, he wasn't sure why though.......

end chapter one.
Of course, you'll want to go back and proofread it a bit if you'd like to be taken seriously. I mean, you know, just for sentence level errors if nothing else.

Besides that, one thing I've learned is that when you start a story you need a good hook. This won't work for one because it's just cliche so far. Both the "leaving a child on the doorstep" and "abusive parents for no real reason" themes are ones that are cliche among today's literature. I'd suggest trying to think out a slightly more interesting way to start.

Anyways, certainly no reason to give it up or anything. Just giving you a few ideas to improve. You don't have to use them all, but it will probably help if you'll consider one or two of these suggestions.