Chiho-Chan's Concert

Idol sensation "Chiho-chan" (her real name was something different) differentiated herself from other idols in her publicity methods. Through several methods of advertising, she'd adopted a number of titles from her fans: "the-girl-next-door," "the love of all," and most popularly "Angel Chiho-Chan." There was even a song written about it. Despite Chiho-chan's genuine wishes to provide good-natured, family entertainment to people of all ages, she was plagued by the fanbase that her image had created: bachelors in their mid-twenties to mid-forties. Burt was one such bachelor, arriving at her concert wearing his usual shabby attire. Chiho-Chan was all he could want from an idol: a genuine smile, beautiful eyes, and a surprisingly large bust for her age. "Ahhh! I can practically smell the innocence and purity wafting off of the stage!" he exclaimed, stretching his arms above his head as he finished paying the ticket fee for the contest and headed for the gates.

"I'm surprised a guy like you knows what that smells like," Bhikkhuni laughed. Exorcist looked at her sadly, like she was attempting some good-spirited but useless task with no chance of success.

Burt shook his head and grinned. "Nah, you don't get it. A guy like me knows how to smell purity better than anyone!" he whistled, walking forward with a long-legged stride. "Oh wait. Normally I don't splurge, but I seriously need some Chiho-Chan memorabilia. I just finished my last magazine!"

"M-Magazine? She makes... those kinds of magazines?" Exorcist asked with a red face, remembering what she'd seen of Burt's reading material over her short career so far as his navi.

The operator shook his head. His face adjusted into a more serious expression as he pushed his glasses up on his nose with two fingers. "Don't you understand? That sort of thing is not an approach that mortal men could handle from Chiho-Chan. It's something everyone wants but everyone agrees is improbable," he answered. "No, these are fashion magazines for kids."

Exorcist and Bhikkhuni stared back blankly, seeming almost more creeped out than if he'd explained that he was looking at child pornography. "So you're... flipping through clothing magazines for young women... to see pictures of this girl in perfectly ordinary, middle-wealth-bracket clothing?" the navi asked again to confirm.

"Yup," he answered, giving a quick nod. "She even showed up in a panties spread once! I've still got that one tacked up in my study," he cooed with an eerie, dreaming smile. As quickly as he could, he made his way to the nearest souvenir stand to look through magazines and posters. "Wow! She has such a nice ass for a fifteen year old! It's hard to believe," he whispered excitedly to his navi and SP as they grew more and more uncomfortable. "I wish I'd gotten front row seats! It's an unconfirmed internet rumor, but they say if you sit in the first row, farthest to the right side, you can see a little glimpse of her costume's panties as she spins clockwise for her routine. I don't think I'm likely to see that until we've cleansed every trace of evil from this world, however."

Bhikkhuni's reaction was purely disgust, but Exorcist was having conflicted feelings. On one hand, listening to him ramble was just plain embarrassing, but on the other, she couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy that there would be another entity that he considered as perfectly crafted as her. It was always awkward when he praised her like that, but at the same time, a little gratifying. Having that uniqueness taken away from the praise made it seem more shallow than ever. The navi devised that she would just have to see Chiho-Chan for herself... Maybe there was a thing or two she could learn about pleasing her operator.

Before Burt could get Exorcist onto the net, the situation changed as a call came up on his PET. As soon as he looked at the number, he was already growling in frustration. "Rrrgargararararargggggh!" he muttered, beating his fists up and down on the souvenir stand. "Nooo! That's not fair at all! I was so close to seeing Chiho-Chan in person!" he roared, bracing his legs and shaking his fists helplessly at the sky.

"What? What's wrong?" Exorcist asked, feeling worried. She hoped another one of his relatives hadn't died; she didn't think he'd be able to handle any additional burden with having to take care of a niece and a nephew already.

"That son of a bitch Darwin just called me and told me they need me to get back at Dentech," he groaned with a heaving sigh, not able to contain his disappointment. "Daaammit! Chiho-Chan! Wait for me!" he called out to her as he left the area.

Bhikkhuni shook her head, then turned to Exorcist. "Who's this Darwin guy anyways?" she asked, raising one eyebrow.

"Oh, uh, he's one of the professors over the Humanities department at Dentech University. He keeps Burt on a leash, sort of... In that he makes sure Burt shows up at his classroom once in a while," she explained.

"Wait, wait... You're telling me that that is a teacher?" she whispered, looking out at Burt. Exorcist nodded her head with a slight smile. The shock registered slowly on her SP's face, then faded. "I'm sure there's an interesting story behind that, but I'm not sure I want to hear it..."

Burt was still furious, even as he arrived at the metroline. "Phooey! Phooey on that man! No way am I teaching on a glorious day like this! I'll help out some other way once I get there... I'm sure the school has something for me to do more fun than teaching," he thought to himself, kicking his leg impatiently as the vehicle took off. "Let's get online and see what we've got..."

((Heading for Dentech))